N° CXXIX.

Facilitas Animi ad partem ftultitia rapit.

Sir,

(P. SYRUS.)

To THE OBSERVER.

THE antient family of the Saplings, whereof your humble fervant is the unworthy reprefentative, has been for many generations diftinguished for a certain pliability of temper, which with fome people paffes for good-humour, and by others is called weaknefs; but however the world may differ in defcribing it, there feems a general agreement in the manner of making use of it.

Our family estate, though far from contempti ble, is confiderably reduced from its antient fpendor, not only by an unlucky tumble that my grandfather Sir Paul got in the famous Miffifippi fcheme, but also by various loffes, bad debts and incautious fecurities, which have fallen heavy upon the purfes of my predeceffors at different times; but as every man muft pay for his good character, I dare fay they did not repent of their purchase, and for my part it is a reflection that never gives me any disturbance. This aforefaid grandfather of mine was fuppofed to have furnished Congreve with the hint for his character of Sir Paul Pliant, at leaft it hath been fo whifpered to me very frequently by my aunt Jemima, who was a great collector of family anecdotes; and, to speak the

truth,

truth, I am not totally without fufpicion, that a certain ingenious author, lately deceafed, had an eye towards my infignificant felf in the dramatic pourtrait of his Good-natured Man.

Though I fcorn the notion of fetting myself off to the public and you by panegyrics of my own penning, (as the manner of fome is) yet I may truly fay without boafting, that I had the character at fchool of being the very best fog that ever came into it; and this I believe every gentleman, who was my contemporary at Weminfler, will do me the juftice to acknowledge: it was a reputation I confefs that I did not earn for nothing, for whilft I worked the clothes off my back and the skin off my bones in fcouting upon every body's, errands, I was pummelled to a mummy by the boys, fhewed up by the ufhers, flea'd alive by the mafters and reported for an incorrigible dunce at my book; a report, which under correction I muft think had fome degree of injuftice in it, as it was impoffible for me to learn a book I was never allowed to open: in this period of my education I took little food and lefs fleep, fo that, whilft I fhot up in ftature after the manner of my progenitors, who were a tall race of men, I grew as gaunt as a greyhound, but having abundantly more fpirit than ftrength, and being voted by the great boys to be what is called True game, I was fingled out as a kind of trial-cock, and pitted against every new comer to make proof of his bottom in fair fighting, though I may fafely fay I never turned out upon a quarrel of my own making in all my life. Notwithstanding all these honours, which I obtained from my colleagues, I will not attempt to disguise from you that I left

the

the school in difgrace, being expelled by the mafter, when head of my boarding houfe, for not fupporting my authority over the petty boys belonging to it, who I must confefs were just then not in the most orderly and correct ftate of difcipline.

My father, whofe maxim it was never to let trifles vex him, received me with all the good humour in life, and admitted me of the univerfity of Oxford: here I was overjoyed to find that the affair of the expulfion was fo far from having prejudiced my contemporaries against me, that I was reforted to by numbers, whofe time hung upon their bands, and my rooms became the rendezvous of all the loungers in the college: few or no fchemes were fet on foot without me, and if a loose guinea or two was wanted for the purpose, every body knew where to have it: I was allowed a horfe for my health's fake, which was rather delicate, but I cannot fay my health was much the better for him, as I never mounted his back above once or twice, whilft my friends kept him in exercife morning and evening, as long as he lafted, which indeed was only till the hunting feafon fet in, when the currier had his hide, and his flesh went to the kennel. I must own I did not excel in any of my academical exercises, fave that of circumambulating the colleges and public buildings with ftrangers, who came to gaze about them for curiofity's fake; in this branch of learning I gained fuch general reputation as to be honoured with the title of Keeper of the Lions : neither will I difguife the frequent jobations I incurred for neglect of college duties, and particularly for non-attendance at chapel, but in this I

fhould

fhould not perhaps have been thought fo reprehenfible, had it been known that my furplice never failed to be there, though I had rarely the credit of bearing it company.

My mother died of a cold fhe caught by attending fome young ladies on a water-party before I had been a month in the world; and my father never married again, having promised her on her death-bed not to bring a stepdame into his family, whilft I furvived: I had the misfortune to lose him when I was in my twenty-fecond year; he got his death at a country canvafs for Sir Harry Ofier, a very obliging gentleman and nearly related to our family: I attended my father's corpfe to the grave, on which melancholy occafion fuch were the lamentations and bewailings of all the fervants in the house, that I thought it but a proper return for their affection to his memory to prove myfelf as kind a master by continuing them in their feveral employs: this however was not altogether what they meant, as I was foon convinced every one amongst them had a remonstrance to make and a new demand to prefer: the butler would have better perquifites, the footman wanted to be out of livery, the fcullion demanded tea-money, and the cook murmured about kitchen-stuff.

Though I was now a fingle being in the world, my friends and neighbours kindly took care I fhould not be a folitary one; I was young indeed and of fmall experience in the world, but I had plenty of counsellors: fome advised me to buy horfes they wanted to fell, others to fell horfes they wanted to buy: a lady of great tafte fell in love with two or three of my best cows for their colour; they were upon her lawn the

next

next day a gentleman of extraordinary virtù discovered a picture or two in my collection, that exactly fitted his pannels: an eminent improver, whom every body declared to be the first genius of the age for laying out grounds, had taken meafures for tranfporting my garden a mile out of my fight, and floating my richest meadow grounds with a lake of muddy water as for my manfion and its appendages I am perfuaded I could never have kept them in their places, had it not been that the feveral projectors, who all united in pulling them down, could never rightly agree in what particular fpot to build them up again: one kind friend complimented me with the firft refufal of a mistress, whom for reafons of economy he was obliged to part from; and a neighbouring gentlewoman, whofe daughter had perhaps stuck on hand a little longer than was convenient, more than hinted to me that Mifs had every requifite in life to make the married ftate perfectly happy.

In justice however to my own difcretion let me fay that I was not haftily furprized into a ferious measure by this latter overture, nor did I afk the young lady's hand in marriage till I was verily perfuaded by her exceflive fondnefs that there were no other means to fave her life. Now whether it was the violence of her paffion before our marriage, that gave fome fhock to her intellects, or from what other caufe it might proceed I know not, certain however it is, that after marriage fhe became fubject to very odd whims and caprices, and though I made it a point of humanity never to thwart her in thefe humours, yet I was feldom fortunate enough to pleafe her; fo that, had I not been fure to demonstration that love for

me