guessed this was the duel you were going about. I should not have left you else; faith, Ned, I should not. Good. But, madam, can the worthy knight, your kinsman, drink? What think you, sir Noble, of the ladies' healths?

Clum. In a glass of small beer, if you please.

Lady Squ. Oh sweet Mr. Goodvile, don't tempt him to drink, don't! I'll swear, I am so afraid he should spoil himself with drinking. Lord, how I should loath a fellow with a red nose!

Val. See, Truman, the two coxcombs are already boarding our mistresses.

Tru. Oh, 'twere pity to interrupt 'em. A woman loves to play and fondle with a coxcomb sometimes, as naturally as with a lap-dog; and I could no more be jealous of one, than of the other.

Val. I am not of your opinion; they are too apt to love any thing that but makes 'em sport. And the familiarity of fools proceeds oftentimes from a privilege we are not aware of. For my part, I shall make bold to divert-Mr. Saunter, a word; have you any pretences with that lady? hah!

Saunt. Some small encouragement I have had, sir; but I never make my boast of those favours, never. Val. No, sir, 'twere your best course.

Saunt. Oh Lord, you are pleased to be merry. Sure he takes me for a fool; but no matter for that. [Sings. Would Phillis be mine, and for, &c.

Enter Boy.

Boy. Madam, the fiddles are below; shall I call 'em up?

Mrs. Good. No, let 'em stay a little, we'll dance below.

Cap. Hah, the fiddles! Boy, where are you?

Boy. Here, sir.

[Cap. capers.

Cap. Have you brought my dancing-shoes?

Boy. No, sir, you gave me no order: but your fiddle is below under the seat of the coach.

Cap. Rascal, dog, fool; when did you ever know me go abroad without my dancing-shoes? Sirrahı, run home and fetch 'em quickly, or I'll cut off both your ears, and have 'em fastened to the heels of those I have on.

Tru. It is an unpardonable fault, sir, that your boy should forget your dancing-shoes.

Cap. Ay, hang him, blockhead, he has no sense: I must get rid of him as soon as I can: I would no more dance in a pair of shoes that we commonly wear, than I would ride a race in a pair of Gambado's.

Lady Squ. Mr. Valentine I hope is a better bred gentleman, than to leave his mistress for wine. I hear, sir, there is a love between you and madam Camilla? Thou monster of perjury. [To Val. Val. Faith, madam, you are much in the right; there is abundance of love on my side, but I can find very little on her's: if your ladyship would but stand my friend upon this occasion.-I think this is civil.

Lady Squ. I'll swear, sir, you are a most obliging person ladies and gallants, poor Mr. Valentine here is fallen in love, and has desired me to be his advocate: who could withstand that eye, that lip, that shape and mien, besides a thousand graces in every thing he does? Oh lovely Camilla! guard, guard your heart; but I'll swear, if it were my own case, I doubt I should notha, ha, ha!

Val. Madam! What means all this?

Good. Poor Ned Valentine!

Tru. "Tis but what I told him he must look for: but stay, there is more yet coming.

Lady Squ. Nay, this is not half what thou art to expect; I'll haunt thee worse than thy ill genius, take all opportunities to expose thy folly and falshood every where, till I have made thee as ridiculous to our whole sex, as thou art odious to me.

Val. But has your ladyship no mercy? Will nothing

but my ruin appease you? Why should you choose by your malice to expose your decay of years, and lay open your poor lover's follies to all, because you could improve 'em to your own use no longer?

[Approaches.

Lady Squ. Come not near me, traitor-Lord, ınadam Camilla, how can you be so cruel? See, see, how wildly he looks: for heaven's sake have a care of him; I fear he is distempered in his mind: what pity 'tis, so hopeful a gentleman should run mad for love-ha, ha, ha!

Mrs. Good. Dear madam, how can you use Mr. Valentine so? 'Tis enough to put him out of humour, and spoil him for being good company all the day after it.

Lady Squ. Oh Lord, madam, 'tis the greatest pleasure to me in the world; let me die, but I love to rally a bashful young lover, and put him out of countenance, at my heart.

Saunt. Ha, ha, ha! and I'll swear the devil and all's in her wit, when she sets on't. Poor Ned Valentine! Lord, how sillily he looks!

Cap. Ay, and would fain be angry if he knew but how. Val. Hark you, coxcomb; I can be angry, very angry, d'ye mark me?

Clum. No, but sir, don't be in a passion: my lady will have her humour; but she's a very good woman at the bottom.

Val. Very likely, sir.

Mrs. Good. Now, madam, if your ladyship thinks fit, we'll withdraw and leave the gentlemen to themselves a little; only Mr. Caper and Mr. Saunter must do us the honour of their company.

Saunt. Say you so, madam? I'faith and you shall have it. Come, Caper, we are the men for the ladies, I see that- Hey boys!

Lady Squ. Oh dear! and sweet Mr. Saunter shalt oblige us with a song.

Saunt. O madam, ten thousand, ten thousand if you

please. I'll swear I believe I could sing all day and all night, and never be weary.

[Sings. When Phillis watch'd her harmless sheep,

Not one poor lamb, &c.

[Ex. Saunter, Caper, and Ladies. Good. A happy riddance this! now, gentlemen, for one bottle to entertain our noble friend and new acquaintance, sir Noble Clumsey.

Clum. Really, gallants, I must beg your pardon; I dare not drink, for I have but a very weak brain, sir, and my head won't bear it.

Tru. Oh, surely that honourable bulk could never be maintained with thin regular diet and small beer.

Clum. I must confess, sir, I am something plump; but a little fat is comely; I would not be too lean.

Mal. No, by no means, my dear, thou hast an heroic face, which well becomes this noble port and fulness of thy body.

Val. Goodvile, we have a suit to you: here is Malagene has been some time in a cloud; for this once receive him into good grace and favour again.

Mal. Faith, Goodvile, do, for without any more words, I love thee with all my heart-faith and troth, give me thy hand.

Good. But, sir, should I allow you my countenance, you would be very drunk, very rude, and very unmannerly, I fear.

Mal. Drunk, sir, I scorn your words, I'd have you know I han't been drunk this week: no, I am the son of a whore if I won't be very sober. This noble knight shall be security for my good behaviour. Wilt thou not, knight?

Clum. Sir, you are a person altogether a stranger to me; and I have sworn never to be bound for any man. Tru. But, sir Noble, you are obliged in honour to serve a gentleman and your friend.

Clum. Say you so, sir? obliged in honour? I am satisfied. Sir, this gentleman is my friend and acquaintance, and whatsoever he says, I'll stand to.

Mal. Hark thee, son of Mars, thou art a knight already; I'll marry thee to a lady of my acquaintance, and have thee made a lord.

Good. Boy, the wine, give sir Noble his glass.-Gentlemen, sir Noble's lady's health.

Clum. Odd's my life, I'll drink that, though I die for't. Gallants, I have a lady in this head of mine, and that you shall find anon. By my troth, I think this be a glass of good wine.

Val. Say you so? take the other glass then, Sir Noble, Clum. 'Fore George, and so I will. Pox on't, let it be a brimmer: gentlemen, God save the king.

Mal. Well said, my lovely man of might. His worship grows good company.

Tru. Sir Noble, you are a great acquaintance with Mr. Caper and Mr. Saunter; they are men of pretty parts.

Clum. Oh, sir, the finest persons the most obliging, well-bred, complaisant, modishi gentlemen: they are acquainted with all the ladies in town, and are men of fine estates.

Tru. This rogue is one of those earthly mongrels that knows the value of nothing but a good estate, and loves a fellow with a great deal of land and a title, though his grandfather were a blacksmith. [Aside. Clum. How say you, sir, a good estate? odd's heart, give me the other glass; I have two thousand pounds a-year.

Mal. Say'st thou so? boy, bring more wine; wine in abundance, sirrah, d'ye hear? Frank Goodvile, thou seest I am free, for faith I hate ceremony, and would fain make the knight merry.

Good. Malagene, it shall be your task; drink him up lustily, and when that's done, we'll bring him to my lady his cousin, it may make some sport.

Val. A very good proposal.

Mal. Say no more; thy word's a law, and it shall be done. Come, bear up, my lusty limb of honour, and hang sobriety.