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"I'll grant your wifh," cries fhe, "that you may fee ""Twere wisdom to be govern'd still by me."

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The guests upon the day appointed came, Each bowfy farmer with his fimp'ring dame. "Ho, Su!” cries Slouch, "why doft not thou appear? "Are these thy manners when aunt Snap is here?" "I pardon afk," fays Su; "I'd not offend

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Any my dear invites, much lefs his friend."

Slouch by his kinfman Gruffy had been taught 35 To entertain his friends with finding fault, And make the main ingredient of his treat His faying "There was nothing fit to eat: "The boil'd pork finks, the roaft beef is not enough, "The bacon is rufty, and the hens are tough; 40 "The veal is all rags, the butter is turn'd to oil, "And thus I buy good meat for fluts to spoil. "'Tis we are the firft Slouches ever fat

Down to a pudding withont plums or fat.

"What teeth or ftomach is ftrong enough to feed 45

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Upon a goose my grannum kept to breed ? "Why muft old pigeons, and they stale, be dreft, "When there is fo many fquab ones in the neft? "This beer is four, this musty thick and ftale, "And worse than any thing except the ale.” Su all this while many excufes made; Some things fhe own'd; at other times fhe laid The fault on chance, but oft'ner on the maid.

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Then Cheefe was brought. Says Slouch," This e'en

fhall roll;

"I'm sure it is hard enough to make a bowl: 155

"This is skimmilk, and therefore it shall go;
"And this because it is Suffolk follow too."

But now Su's patience did begin to waste,
Nor longer could diffimulation last.

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Pray let me rife," fays Su," my Dear! I'll find "A Cheese perhaps may be to Lovy's mind.” Then in an entry ftanding clofe, where he Alone and none of all his friends might fee, And brandishing a cudgel he had felt, And far enough on this occafion fmelt,

"I'll try, my Joy!" the cry'd, "if I can please "My deareft with a taste of his Old Cheefe !'!

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Slouch turn'd his head, faw his wife's vig'rous hand Wielding her oaken fapling of command; Knew wellthetwang. "Is'ttheOldCheesemy Dear!" "No need, no need of Cheefe," cries Slouch; "I'll

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** I think I've din'd as well as my Lord Mayor !”

Two

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wo neighbours, Clod and Jolt, would marry'd be, But did not in their choice of wives agree.

Clod thought a cuckold was a monstrous beaft,
With two huge glaring eyes and spreading crest,

Therefore refolving never to be fuch,
Marry'd a wife none but himself could touch.
Jolt thinking marriage was decreed by Fate,
Which fhews as whom to love and whom to hate,
To a young handfome jolly lafs made court,
And gave his friends convincing reasons for 't, 10
That fince in life fuch mischief must be had
Beauty had something still that was not bad.
Within two months Fortune was pleas'd to fend
A tinker to Clod's house with " Brafs to mend."
The good old wife survey'd the brawny spark, 15
And found his chine was large tho' count'nance dark.
Firft fhe appears in all her airs, then tries
The fquinting efforts of her am'rous eyes.
Much time was spent and much defire expreft;
At last the tinker cry'd, " Few words are heft: 20
"Give me that Skillet then; and if I'm true
"I dearly earn it for the work I do."

They 'greed; they parted. On the tinker goes
With the same stroke of pan and twang of nose,
Till he at Jolt's beheld a sprightly dame
That fet his native vigour all on flame.
He looks, fighs, faints, at last begins to cry,
"And can you then let a young tinker die?”

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Says he, "Give me your Skillet then and try." "My Skillet! both my heart and Skillet take; 30 "I with it were a copper for your fake.”

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After all this not many days did pafs Clod fitting at Jolt's houfe furvey'd the brafs And glitt'ring pewter ftanding on the shelf, Then after fome gruff mutt'ring with himself Cry'd," Pr'ythee, Jolt, how came that Skillet thine!" "Youknow as well as 1," quoth Jolt; "it'en't mines "But I'll afk Nan." "Twas done: Nan told the matter In truth as it was; then cry'd, “You've got the better: "For tell me, Deareft! whether you would chuse 40 "To be a gainer by me or to lofe?

"As for our neighbour Clod, this I dare fay, "We've Beauty and a Skillet more than they," 43

THE FISHERMAN.

Tom Banks by native induftry was taught
The various arts how fishes might be caught.
Sometimes with trembling reed and fingle hair,
And bait conceal'd, he 'd for their death prepare,
With melancholy thoughts and downcaft eyes
Expecting till deceit had gain'd its prize.
Sometimes in riv'let quick and water clear
They'd meet a fate more gen'rous from his fpear.
To basket oft' he 'd pliant ofiers turn,

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Where they might entrance find but no return.
His net well pois'd with lead he 'd sometimes throw,
Encircling thus his captives all below:

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But when he would a quick destruction make,
And from afar much larger booty take,
He'd thro' the ftream where most descending set
From fide to fide his ftrong capacious net,
And then his ruftick crew with mighty poles
Would drive his prey out from their oozy holes,
And fo pursue them down the rolling flood
Gafping for breath, and almost chok'd with mud, 20
Till they of farther paffage quite bereft
Were in the mash with gills entangled left.

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Trot, who liv'd down the stream, ne'er thought his Was good unless he had his water clear. He goes to Banks, and thus begins his tale : “Lord! if you knew but how the people rail! "They cannot boil, nor wash, nor rinse, they say, "With water fometimes ink and fometimes whey, "According as you meet with mud or clay. "Befides, my wife these fix months could not brew, "And now the blame of this all is laid on you; 31 *For it will be a dismal thing to think

"How we old Trots must live and have no drink; "Therefore I pray fome other method take "Of fishing, were it only for our fake.”

Says Banks, “I'm sorry it should be my lot

"Ever to disoblige my goffip Trot:

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"Yet it 'en't my fault; but so it is Fortune tries one "To make his meat become his neighbour's poison;

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