as fat as she can go, and this is the return I get for my kindness. Six dollars a month, Sir, she has had from me for the last five months, and now to insult my lodgers. But she shall tramp, and Richard shall tramp - they shall all tramp, Sir, I assure you, rather than you should leave the house on their account. Here-Richard, Betty, Jane, Lucilla.'

Was there ever such an old goose? I stopped her in the midst of her howlings, though with monstrous great difficulty.

'Mrs. Jenkins-I am not going to leave your lodgings, unless I die before I come back, which I shall probably do in the course of the afternoon. But, whether I live or die, I am desirous of paying up my little bill; and if you will only sit down and give it me in the course of a few moments, you will infinitely oblige me.'

'Dear me, Mr. Topic, but it's very early; you need n't be in any hurry.'

I looked at my watch. It was not yet six. There was time enough, it is true, but I still hurried her. Better soon than late. Mrs. Jenkins, however, was not a lady to be easily hurried. She had a speech to make for every item.

6

Three weeks and three days-twenty-four days, Mr. Topic, at one dollar by the day —'

Is twenty-four dollars, Mrs. Jenkins.'

Right, Sir, exactly.

'A friend on the 9th

Then, sir, a friend on the 7th is

A friend at supper on the 10th is

Two friends on the 13th

I tried to stop her.

$0.50

0 50

050

1 00.'

'Say the whole amount, Mrs. Jenkins, do n't mind the items. The amount total.'

In vain — the old lady feared to cheat herself, as she had been rather more rapid in making out her bill than usual; and no expostulation or impatience on my part could move her a jot. She proceeded to enumerate friends on this day, friends on that wine, so many bottles-boot-cleaning, so many weeks-lamps and oil for so many weeks - and heaven only knows how many items of charge, industriously put together by an ingenious and experienced landlady, educated in her art in Philadelphia. I got away at last, having satisfied my conscience by paying her bill in full. I dreaded lest I might be too late for my engagement, for it seemed to me, in my impatience, that I had spent an hour in this idle controversy with Mrs. Jenkins; but, looking at my watch, I found that I was safe that it was still short of six o'clock.

When I got to Rocket's lodgings, to my great surprise, I found that he was already gone. What a restless and impatient fellow. I looked at my watch, and found, to my great satisfaction, that I was still before my time, and that no blame could possibly be attributed to me. But I saw through Rocket's intentions. He was such a monstrous fire-eater, that I felt confident he had hurried off in order to get a first shot with Walton in advance of me. This was unkind. I certainly had the prior claim, though, when I reflected how great a pleasure it was to Rocket, I could not find it in my heart to reproach him. Going down to the pier, where I purposed to take a

boat, an urchin came to me to sell morning papers. I bought a Gazette and an Inquirer, at sixpence each, but the lad could not change the Mexican which I gave him until he had run a hundred yards off, and kept me waiting ten minutes. While he was gone I engaged a boat, and-bought some peaches. Between the peaches and the papers I amused myself well enough until I crossed the river. I then took a hack, and bade the fellow drive to Oxley's Farm, only five miles distant. While we rode I read. The papers amused me, and I had half forgotton the business I was bent upon when a sudden crash, and dash, and splash, aroused me from my unconsciousness. Our hack was utterly demolished, and I found myself scrambling out of it and into a ditch, in which it partially lay. The vile old vehicle, a Jersey transaction, had actually gone to pieces; and the journey was only half performed.

'Great Heaven! driver, what are we to do? I shall be too late!' Not a bit!' said the rascal, surlily enough.

Why, how do you know any thing about it?' I asked, angrily, chafed at the fellow's insolence.

'Guess you're guine after no good!' he said, contemptuously, in reply. I could have brained him where he stood, but I had no time. I had two miles to walk, but, looking at my watch, I found that I was still in season. It was not yet six o'clock. I thrust my remaining peaches and papers into my pocket, and hurried away as fast as I could; glad to find that, in spite of all my mishaps and delays of the morning, I should still be in time.

In less than an hour I arrived upon the ground. This was excellent walking on a Jersey road. There, sure enough, I found all the parties. Rocket was the first to receive me. His countenance boded bad weather. His mood was evidently soured by something. His first words were scarcely civil.

Well, Sir! what the d-1 has kept you from your appointment?" I felt disposed to answer him sharply; but as we were in the presence of our opponents, I tried to be as calm and gentle as possible.

Kept me, major? I have been detained and delayed- that is true-but, thank Heaven, I am punctual in this particular to my appointment.

Punctual to your appointment?—the d-l you are!' exclaimed he, with a savage countenance. 'I should like to know how you make that out? You were to meet me at half past six, and we were to have been upon the ground at seven.'

Well!' I exclaimed, coolly pulling out my watch, ‘here I am; and, as you see, it is not even six yet. Look!"

Why, what the d-1 sort of a watch is that, Mr. Topic?' was the exclamation of Rocket. Not six ?-why, Sir, it is after seven!' I put my watch to my ear, and was aghast. She had run down. I had neglected winding her up, as was my usual habit, during the previous afternoon, and she had stopped within a few minutes of six. She had kept time with a vengeance! She had wasted none! But I-I was, as usual, just half an hour too late!

I may well say so. Rocket had grown impatient at my non-appearance, and some casual remark from the acting friend of Walton had so chafed him, that he remembered that he too had a claim upon

that gentleman. He silenced the cavilling second very soon, and after a fashion of his own.

We are ready, Sir, if you please. Your complaint is misplaced and quite unnecessary. Some difficulty we know not what-delays my principal — but I am here, not only to serve him as second, but, if need be, to fill his place.'

Oh, no necessity for that, Major Rocket. We will willingly wait a while,' said the other, in a conciliatory manner.

To be sure we will wait,' said Rocket in reply; but we will not wait idly. Let us to business. Your principal will recollect that I have a small claim on his regards, which I purposed, through motives of friendship, to waive in behalf of Mr. Topic, as I esteemed his injuries to be more serious than mine. Whether they were or not, however, matters little. As he does not appear, he cannot reasonably complain, Sir, if I put his business aside for a moment, and pay some little attention to my own. With your leave, therefore, Lieutenant Thompson, I will take my position, and you will place your friend. Your eye and hand to pistols and position will satisfy me-the distance I also leave with you, and will only, with your permission, reserve to myself the word, as I am not accustomed to the peculiar tone of your

voice.'

But, my dear Major Rocket,' said Thompson, my friend has no affair with you.'

I have with him, Lieutenant Thompson, if you please,' was the cool response.

'But, Sir, I cannot permit this,' said the other.

'Permit what you please, Lieutenant Thompson, you will not suffer your friend to submit to, or provoke indignity,' was the significant response of Rocket.

Surely not,' responded Thompson; and if you insist upon his fighting you, the claim of course must be allowed, in order that he may avoid and prevent indignity; but you will, at least, before I suffer this matter to go on, inform me of the ground of issue.'

Certainly nothing more reasonable. Your friend, Sir, when I waited upon him on behalf of Mr. Topic, actually thought to put me aside, and would have proceeded to my principal, but that I placed the matter before him in the most peremptory form. You will understand readily, Lieutenant Thompson, as a gentleman honoured with an epaulet, the necessity of checking and punishing any disparagement of an acting representative in an affair of this nature. The delicacy, Lieutenant Thompson, which should characterize parties to a personal contest, renders this concern our duty.'

Thompson was struck with the argument, and acquiesced.

'I am truly sorry-how could Mr. Walton err after this fashion ?— but, if you insist, Major Rocket?'

The major simply bowed, looked excruciated, and put his right hand on his left breast, as much as to say,

'It touches me nearly, lieutenant the thing is unavoidable.'

Poor Walton, of course, had not a word to say in all this business. He was utterly silent-in the hands, and at the disposition, of his friend. distance seven paces —

The preliminaries were soon arranged

the word to be given by Major Rocket himself. On this point he explained himself apologetically to Lieutenant Thompson after the following manner: the validity of the reason given is scarcely obvious enough:

'My ear is wonderfully nice, Lieutenant Thompson-morbidly nice. A sound, however slight, which is unmusical, I turn from involuntarily it disturbs - it disquiets me. I have remarked that the louder tones of your voice are rather harsh, and there is a ringing sharpness at the close of your utterance which does not altogether accord with my organs of tune. It would doubtlessly throw me out a little. If you prefer it, however, you may substitute the sign for the sound, and the dropping of your handkerchief will answer the purposes of the word.'

Thompson waived the point, however, and Rocket assured him that the words should be spoken in tones at once full, distinct, and harmonious intelligence, no doubt, highly gratifying to my friend Walton.

'I will not hurt the gentleman seriously, Lieutenant Thompson,' said Rocket complacently not seriously, for I cannot forget that in so doing I might prevent the affair from proceeding between our mutual principals — an interruption for which, I fear me, I should not readily receive the forgiveness of either party. I should be loath, certainly, to interfere in this respect with the contemplated enjoyment of my friend; but I owe it to myself, Lieutenant Thompson, to wing Mr. Walton, at least, though I shall be careful not to trouble his pistol-arm.'

Do your best, Major Rocket,' said the other, somewhat proudly; 'I shall instruct my principal not to trouble his aim with any such nice considerations.'

That is right, Sir- -you are kind. I am in place; and, whenever you tell me that your friend is ready, I shall be bound, instantly, to solicit his fire.'

The day was cloudy, and there was no necessity to choose ground with any reference to the sunlight. This matter was soon settled, and it was signified to Rocket that he might give the word as soon as he thought proper. His tones were indeed musical, and were not well articulated before the ball of Walton went through the lapel of his waistcoat.

'Rather a good shot for a level, but not so well for a line,' was the calm remark of Rocket, whose bullet at the same time inflicted a flesh wound upon the left arm of his opponent a wound which he

studiously took care should be a slight one.

'You are satisfied, Major Rocket?' was the inquiry of Thomp

son.

For myself- yes. The privilege of a second shot lies with your friend, par courtesie.'

This was waived, and the affair had been just settled, when I came upon the ground.

And now came my turn. There was no getting off; and, evidently dissatisfied with my delay in coming, yet delighted that he was not to be altogether disappointed in his desire for sport, Major Rocket proceeded to make his arrangements, in concert with Thompson, for

the proper progress of the affair. Meanwhile, Walton and myself stood eying each other with great coolness and civility at a little distance. We had exchanged bows, and there was to be no more communication betwen us till our exchange of shots. While I looked upon him my heart relented. How long had we been close friends? How intimately associated-in how many boyish frolics— in how many youthful pleasures! Was I now, in reality, the seeker of his blood? My conscience smote me with the reflection. I had no sort of enmity against him no ill feeling. I could not convince myself that he had played me unfairly in the matter of my courtship and his own. But, then, the public thought so-the wise, the discriminating, the nice, all-judging, unobtrusive public- they thought my injuries enormous, and clamored lustily that I should have redress. The newspaper editors also cried aloud with a mighty voice, though I well knew that, if I shot my man, they would, the very next day, denounce me as a murderer, and invoke the mob for my punishment. This public opinion is a strange thing. It is something beyond the laws -expected to redress where the laws cannot; and yet, when public opinion becomes public action, which it is very apt to do, and the mob pulls down the monster, what an outcry is then made by the journalists. How they exhort, and chide, and lament. What homilies do they put forth for months after. But, all on a sudden - let their rulers offend them, or let their laws offend them, then they call once more on the same public opinion to put itself in action, raise its vigorous hammer, destroy the tyrant, and ridicule the laws into nullity. Sweet journalists-wise public opinion-gentle mob! But Major Rocket waits.

'MAJOR, take a peach,' I said, taking half a dozen from my pocket, and offering them to that personage.

'I thank you, Mr. Topic; but I never permit myself to eat fruit in cloudy weather. Fruit is always unwholesome in a humid atmosphere; and the digestive organs, at such a period, seldom do their duty properly. Fruit, Sir, let me say to you, is only to be eaten in daylight and sunshine. It is unwholesome at all other periods.'

We are ready, Major Rocket,' said Thompson.

'Pardon me, Sir, I take shame to myself that the intimation did not come from us,' said Rocket, with an air of chivalric mortification. Continuing, he turned to me with his final directions.

'Remember, Mr. Topic, the word and line are every thing. With the utterance of the one make sure of the other, and all is right. D n your mere levels in pistol shooting.'

We were placed, and in waiting for the word. The weather suddenly grew uncomfortably warm. I never experienced a greater change. I looked at Walton, and his pistol muzzle had been enlarged to the size of a twenty-four-pounder's, and covered every possible inch of my body. He, too, seemed to have undergone a most unnatural change. He now looked as red and fierce as a salamander. I began to feel very uncomfortable, when the word- an awful sound, was given, and we both elevated our weapons. Old thoughts inspired me as I did so; and though, in that first and only glance which I