No. 532.]

THE SPECTATOR.

303

-Fungor vice cotis, acutum
Reddere quæ ferrum valet, exsors ipsa secandi.
Hor. Ars Poet. ver. 304.

considered, I shall here only take notice of | No. 532.] Monday, November 10, 1712. that habitual worship and veneration which we ought to pay to this Almighty Being. We should often refresh our minds with the thought of him, and annihilate ourselves before him, in the contemplation of our own worthlessness, and of his transcendent excellency and perfection. This would imprint in our minds such a constant and uninterrupted awe and veneration as that which I am here recommending, and which is in reality a kind of incessant prayer, and reasonable humiliation of the soul before him who made it.

This would effectually kill in us all the little seeds of pride, vanity, and self-conceit, which are apt to shoot up in the minds of such whose thoughts turn more on those comparative advantages which they enjoy over some of their fellow-creatures, than on that infinite distance which is placed between them and the supreme model of all perfection. It would likewise quicken our desires and endeavours of uniting ourselves to him by all the acts of religion and

virtue.

Such an habitual homage to the Supreme Being would, in a particular manner, banish from among us that prevailing impiety of using his name on the most trivial occasions.

I find the following passage in an excellent sermon, preached at the funeral of a gentleman who was an honour to his country, and a more diligent as well as successful inquirer into the works of nature than any other our nation has ever produced. 'He had the profoundest veneration for the great God of heaven and earth that I have ever observed in any person. The very name of God was never mentioned by him without a pause and a visible stop in his discourse; in which one, that knew him most particularly above twenty years, has told me that he was so exact, that he does not remember to have observed him once to fail in it.

I play the whetstone: useless and unfit To cut myself, I sharpen others wit.-Creech. It is a very honest action to be studious to produce other men's merit; and I make no scruple of saying, I have as much of this temper as any man in the world. It would not be a thing to be bragged of, but that is what any man may be master of, who will take pains enough for it. Much observation of the unworthiness in being pained at the excellence of another will bring you to a scorn of yourself for that unwillingness; and when you have got so far, you will find it a greater pleasure than your ever before knew to be zealous in promoting the fame and welfare of the praiseworthy. I do not speak this as pretending to be a mortified self-denying man, but as one who had turned his ambition into a right channel. I claim to myself the merit of having extorted excellent productions from a person of the greatest abilities, who would not have let them appeared by any other means;† to have animated a few young gentlemen into worthy pursuits, who will be a glory to our age; and at all times, and by all possible means in my power, undermined the interest of ignorance, vice, and folly, and attempted to substitute in their stead, learning, piety, and good sense. It is from this honest heart that I find myself honoured as a gentleman-usher to the arts and sciences.-Mr. Tickell and Mr. Pope have, it seems, this idea of me. The former has writ me an excellent paper of verses, in praise, forsooth, of myself; and the other enclosed for my perusal an admirable poem, which I hope will shortly see the light. In the mean time I cannot suppress any thought of his, but insert this sentiment about the dying words of Adrian. I will not determine in the case he mentions; but have thus much to say in favour of his argument, that many of his own works which I have seen, convince me that very pretty and very sublime sentiments may be lodged in the same bosom without dimi nution of its greatness.

Every one knows the veneration which was paid by the Jews to a name so great, wonderful, and holy. They would not let it enter even into their religious discourses. What can we then think of those who make use of so tremendous a name in the ordinary expressions of their anger, mirth, and most impertinent passions? of those who admit it in company with five or six men of some 'MR. SPECTATOR,-I was the other day into the most familiar questions and asser-learning: where, chancing to mention the tions, ludicrous phrases, and works of humour? not to mention those who violate it

famous verses which the emperor Adrian spoke on his death-bed, they were all agreed that it was a piece of gayety unI could not but dissent from this opinion. worthy that prince in those circumstances. Methinks it was by no means a gay but a

by solemn perjuries! It would be an affront to reason to endeavour to set forth the horror and profaneness of such a practice. The very mention of it exposes it sufficiently to those in whom the light of nature, not to say religion, is not utterly ex-very serious soliloquy to his soul at the tinguished.

O.

*See bishop Burnet's Sermon, preached at the funeral of the honourable Robert Boyle.

point of his departure: in which sense I naturally took these verses at my first read. ing them, when I was very young, and be

"Alas, my soul! thou pleasing compa-j nion of this body, thou fleeting thing that art now deserting it, whither art thou flying? to what unknown region? Thou art all trembling, fearful, and pensive. Now what is become of thy former wit and humour? Thou shalt jest and be gay no more."

'I confess I cannot apprehend where lies the trifling in all this; it is the most natural and obvious reflection imaginable to a dying man: and, if we consider the emperor was a heathen, that doubt concerning the future state of his soul will seem so far from being the effect of want of thought, that it was scarce reasonable he should think otherwise: not to mention that there is a plain confession included of his belief in its immortality. The diminutive epithets of vagula, blandula, and the rest, appear not to me as expressions of levity, but rather of endearment and concern; such as we find in Catullus, and the authors of Hendecasyllabi after him, where they are used to express the utmost love and tenderness for their mistresses. If you think me right in my notion of the last words of Adrian, be pleased to insert this in the Spectator; if not, suppress it.

various characters of fine women preferable to Miranda. In a word, she is never guilty of doing any thing but one amiss, (if she can be thought to do amiss by me) in being as blind to my faults, as she is to her own perfections. I am, sir, your very humble, obedient servant, DUSTERERASTUS,'

custom of parents in forcing their children | beauty, yet there is none among all your to marry contrary to their inclinations. My own case, without farther preface, I will lay before you, and leave you to judge of it. My father and mother, both being in declining years, would fain see me, their eldest son, as they call it, settled. I am as much for that as they can be; but I must be settled, it seems, not according to my own, but their liking. Upon this account I am teased every day, because I have not 'MR. SPECTATOR,-When you spent so yet fallen into love, in spite of nature, with much time as you did lately in censuring one of a neighbouring gentleman's daugh- the ambitious young gentlemen who ride ters; for out of their abundant generosity, in triumph through town and country on they give me the choice of four. "Jack," coach-boxes, I wish you had employed begins my father. "Mrs. Catharine is a those moments in consideration of what fine woman."-"Yes, sir, but she is rather passes sometimes within-side of those vehitoo old."-"She will make the more dis- cles. I am sure I suffered sufficiently by creet manager, boy.' Then my mother the insolence and ill-breeding of some perplays her part. "Is not Mrs. Betty exceed-sons who travelled lately with me in the ing fair?"-"Yes, madam, but she is of no stage-coach out of Essex to London. I am conversation; she has no fire, no agreeable sure, when you have heard what I have to vivacity; she neither speaks nor looks with say, you will think there are persons under spirit.""True, son, but for those very the character of gentlemen, that are fit to reasons she will be an easy, soft, obliging, be no where else but on the coach-box. tractable creature."-" After all," cries an Sir, I am a young woman of a sober and old aunt, (who belongs to the class of those religious education, and have preserved who read plays with spectacles on,)" what that character; but on Monday was fortthink you, nephew, of proper Mrs. Doro- night, it was my misfortune to come to thy?""What do I think? why, I think London. I was no sooner clapped into the she cannot be above six foot two inches coach, but, to my great surprise, two per high."—" Well, well, you may banter as sons in the habit of gentlemen attacked me long as you please, but height of stature with such indecent discourse as I cannot is commanding and majestic."-"Come, repeat to you, so you may conclude not fit come," says a cousin of mine in the family, for me to hear. I had no relief but the "I will fit him; Fidelia is yet behind- hopes of a speedy end of my short journey. pretty Miss Fiddy must please you." Sir, form to yourself what a persecution "Oh! your very humble servant, dear coz, this must needs be to a virtuous and chaste she is as much too young as her eldest sis- mind; and, in order to your proper handter is too old."—"Is it so, indeed," quoth ling such a subject, fancy your wife or she, "good Mr. Pert? You that are but daughter, if you had any, in such circumturned of twenty-two, and Miss Fiddy in stances, and what treatment you would half a year's time will be in her teens, then think due to such dragoons. One of and she is capable of learning any thing. them was called a captain, and entertained Then she will be so observant; she will us with nothing but filthy stupid questions, cry perhaps now and then, but never be or lewd songs, all the way. Ready to burst angry. Thus they will think for me in with shame and indignation, I repined that this matter, wherein I am more particu-nature had not allowed us as easily to shut larly concerned than any body else. If I our ears as our eyes. But was not this a name any woman in the world, one of these kind of rape? Why should there be acdaughters has certainly the same qualities. cessaries in ravishment any more than You see by these few hints, Mr. Spectator, murder? Why should not every contriwhat a comfortable life I lead. To be still butor to the abuse of chastity suffer death? more open and free with you, I have been I am sure these shameless hell-hounds depassionately fond of a young lady (whom served it highly. Can you exert yourself give me leave to call Miranda) now for better than on such an occasion? If you do these three years. I have often urged the not do it effectually, I will read no more of matter home to my parents with all the your papers. Has every impertinent felsubmission of a son, but the impatience of low a privilege to torment me, who pay a lover. Pray, sir, think of three years: my coach-hire as well as he? Sir, pray what inexpressible scenes of inquietude, consider us in this respect as the weakest what variety of misery must I have gone sex, who have nothing to defend ourselves; through in three whole years! Miranda's and I think it is as gentleman-like to chalfortune is equal to those I have mentioned; lenge a woman to fight as to talk obscenely but her relations are not intimates with in her company, especially when she has mine! Ah! there's the rub! Miranda's not power to stir. Pray let me tell you a person, wit, and humour, are what the story which you can make fit for public nicest fancy could imagine; and, though view. I knew a gentleman who, having a we know you to be so elegant a judge of very good opinion of the gentlemen of the VOL. II.

39

-We seldom find

Much sense with an exalted fortune joined.

Stepney.

army, invited ten or twelve of them to sup with him; and at the same time invited two or three friends who were very severe against the manners and morals of gentleMR. SPECTATOR,-I am a young woman men of that profession. It happened one of nineteen, the only daughter of very of them brought two captains of his regi- wealthy parents, and have my whole life ment newly come into the army, who at been used with a tenderness which did me the first onset engaged the company with no great service in my education. I have very lewd healths and suitable discourse. perhaps an uncommon desire for knowledge You may easily imagine the confusion of of what is suitable to my sex and quality; the entertainer, who finding some of his but, as far as I can remember, the whole friends very uneasy, desired to tell them dispute about me has been, whether such the story of a great man, one Mr. Locke, a thing was proper for the child to do, or (whom I find you frequently mention) that not? or whether such or such a food was being invited to dine with the then lords the more wholesome for the young lady to Halifax, Anglesey, and Shaftesbury, im- eat? This was ill for my shape, that for my mediately after dinner, instead of conver- complexion, and the other for my eyes. sation, the cards were called for, where am not extravagant when I tell you, I do the bad or good success produced the usual not know that I have trod upon the very passions of gaming. Mr. Locke, retiring earth ever since I was ten years old. Á to a window, and writing, my lord Angle- coach or chair I am obliged to for all my sey desired to know what he was writing: motions from one place to another ever "Why, my lords," answered he, "I could since I can remember. All who had to do not sleep last night for the pleasure and to instruct me, have ever been bringing improvement I expected from the conver- stories of the notable things I have said, sation of the greatest men of the age.' and the womanly manner of my behaving This so sensibly stung them, that they myself upon such and such an occasion. gladly compounded to throw their cards in This has been my state until I came tothe fire, if he would his paper, and so a con-wards years of womanhood: and ever since versation ensued fit for such persons. This grew towards the age of fifteen I have story pressed so hard upon the young cap-been abused after another manner. Now, tains, together with the concurrence of their superior officers, that the young fellows left the company in confusion. Sir, I know you hate long things; but if you like it you may contract it, or how you will; but I think it has a moral in it.

forsooth, I am so killing, no one can safely speak to me. Our house is frequented by when I fall into such conversation; but I men of sense, and I love to ask questions am cut short with something or other about my bright eyes. There is, sir, a language But, sir, I am told you are a famous particular for talking to women in; and mechanic as well as a looker-on, and there- none but those of the very first good-breedfore humbly propose you would inventing (who are very few, and who seldom some padlock, with full come into my way) can speak to us without power under your hand and seal, for all modest persons, regard to our sex. Among the generality either men or women, to clap upon the of those they call gentlemen, it is impossimouths of all such impertinent impudent ble for me to speak upon any subject whatfellows: and I wish you would publish a soever, without provoking somebody to say, proclamation, that no modest person who "Oh! to be sure, fine Mrs. Such-a-one has value for her countenance, and conse- must be very particularly acquainted with quently would not be put out of it, presume all that; all the world would contribute to to travel after such a day without one of her entertainment and information." Thus, them in their pockets. I fancy a smart sir, I am so handsome, that I murder all Spectator upon this subject would serve for who approach me; so wise, that I want no such a padlock; and that public notice new notices; and so well-bred, that I am may be given in your paper where they treated by all that know me like a fool, for may be had, with directions, price two no one will answer as if I were their friend pence; and that part of the directions may take the part of us beauties and fortunes or companion. Pray, sir, be pleased to be, when any person presumes to be guilty of the above-mentioned crime, the party into your consideration, and do not let us aggrieved may produce it to his face, with be thus flattered out of our senses. I have a request to read it to the company. He got a huzzy of a maid who is most craftily must be very much hardened that could given to this ill quality. I was at first dioutface that rebuke; and his farther pu- verted with a certain absurdity the creanishment I leave you to prescribe. Your ture was guilty of in every thing she said. humble servant, She is a country girl; and in the dialect of the shire she was born in, would tell me that every body reckoned her lady had the purest red and white in the world: then

T.

"PENANCE CRUEL.'

No. 534.] Wednesday, November 12, 1712. she would tell me I was the most like one

Sisly Dobson in their town, who made the miller make away with himself, and walk

afterwards in the corn-field where they used to meet. With all this, this cunning huzzy can lay letters in my way, and put a billet in my gloves, and then stand in it she knows nothing of it. I do not know, from my birth to this day, that I have been ever treated by any one as I ought; and if it were not for a few books, which I delight in, I should be at this hour a novice to all common sense. Would it not be worth your while to lay down rules for behaviour in this case, and tell people, that we fair ones expect honest plain answers as well as other people? Why must I, good sir, because I have a good air, a fine complexion, and am in the bloom of my years, be misled in all my actions; and have the notions of good and ill confounded in my mind, for no other offence, but because I have the advantages of beauty and fortune? Indeed, sir, what with the silly homage which is paid to us by the sort of people I have above spoken of, and the utter negligence which others have for us, the conversation of us young women of condition is no other than what must expose us to ignorance and vanity, if not vice. All this is humbly submitted to your spectatorial wisdom, by sir, your humble servant,

'SHARLOT WEALTHY.'

'Will's Coffee-house. 'MR. SPECTATOR,-Pray, sir, it will serve to fill up a paper if you put in this; which is only to ask, whether that copy of verses which is a paraphrase of Isaiah, in one of your speculations, is not written by Mr. Pope? Then you get on another line, by putting in, with proper distances, as at the end of a letter, I am, sir, your humble

servant,

'MR. SPECTATOR,-I am in the condi tion of the idol you was once pleased to mention, and bar-keeper of a coffee-house. I believe it is needless to tell you the oppor tunities I must give, and the importunities I suffer. But there is one gentleman who besieges me as close as the French did Bouchain. His gravity makes him work cautious, and his regular approaches denote a good engineer. You need not doubt of his oratory, as he is a lawyer; and especially since he has had so little use of it at Westminster, he may spare the more for me.

What then can weak women do? I am willing to surrender, but he would have it at discretion, and I with discretion. In the mean time, whilst we parley, our several interests are neglected. As his siege grows stronger, my tea grows weaker; and while he pleads at my bar, none come to him for counsel but in forma pauperis. Dear Mr. Spectator, advise him not to insist upon hard articles, nor by his irregular desires contradict the well meaning lines of his countenance. If we were agreed, we might settle to something, as soon as we could determine where we should get most by the law-at the coffee-house, or at Westminster. Your humble servant,

'LUCINDA PARLEY.'

A Minute from Mr. John Sly. 'The world is pretty regular for about forty rod east and ten west of the observatory of the said Mr. Sly; but he is credibly informed, that when they are got beyond the pass into the Strand, or those who move city-ward are got within Temple-bar, they are just as they were before. It is therefore humbly proposed, that moving centries may be appointed all the busy hours of the 6 ABRAHAM DAPPERWIT.' day between the Exchange and Westmin'MR. DAPPERWIT,-I am glad to get ster, and report what passes to your hoanother line forward, by saying that excel-nour, or your subordinate officers, from lent piece is Mr. Pope's; and so, with time to time.' proper distances, I am, your humble servant, THE SPECTATOR.' 'MR. SPECTATOR,-I was a wealthy grocer in the city, and as fortunate as diligent; but I was a single man, and you know there are women. One in particular came to my shop, who I wished might, but was No. 535.] Thursday, November 13, 1712.

afraid never would, make a grocer's wife. I thought, however, to take an effectual way of courting, and sold her at less price than I bought, that I might buy at less price than I sold. She, you may be sure, often came and helped me to many customers at the same rate, fancying I was obliged to her. You must needs think this was a good living trade, and my riches must be vastly improved. In fine, I was nigh being declared bankrupt, when I declared myself her lover, and she, herself married. I was just in a condition to support myself, and am now in hopes of growing rich by losing my customers. Yours,

JEREMY COMFIT.'

Ordered,

That Mr. Sly name the said officers, proand morals. vided he will answer for their principles T.