PHIDIPPIDES. (as before.) "Difmount; unharness and away! STREPSIADES. 66 I thank you, "You have unharnefs'd me; I am difmounted, "And with a vengeance; all my goods in pawn, "Fines, forfeitures and penalties in plenty. PHIDIPPIDES. "My Father!-Why so restless; who has vext you? STREPSIADES. "The Sheriff vexes me; he breaks my rest. PHIDIPPIDES. "Peace, peace! and let me sleep awhile. STREPSIADES. "Sleep on; "But take this with you, all thefe debts of mine "Will double on your head. A plague confound "My evil Genius, when the crochet took me "To wed forfooth! that precious dam of thine. "I liv'd at eafe ' th' country, coarsely clad, "Rough, free and full withal as oil and honey "And ftore of stock cou'd make me, till I took, "Clown as I was, this limb of quality, "This vain, extravagant, high-blooded dame. "Rare bedfellows and dainty, were we not? "I fmelling of the wine-vat, figs and fleeces, "The produce of my farm-All effence fhe, "Saffron and harlot's kiffes, feast and frolick, "A pamper'd wanton-Idle I'll not call her, "For fhe takes pains enough to spend my money; "Which made me tell her, pointing to this cloak "Now threadbare on my shoulders-See, good wife, "This is your work; in troth you labour hard. (Boy re-enters.) "Mafter! the lamp has drank up all its oil. STREPSIADES. "Aye, 'tis a drunken lamp-The more fault yours: “Whelp, you shall howl for this ! Boy. "From cramming fuch a greedy wick with oil. (exit Boy.) "Well! in good time this hopeful heir was born; "Then I and my beloved fell to wrangling "About the naming of the brat-My wife "Would dub her colt Xanthippus, or Charippus, "Or it might be Callipedes, the car'd not, "So 'twere a horse, which own'd the name-But I "Stuck for his grandfather Phidonides. "At laft, when neither cou'd prevail, the matter "Was compromis'd by calling him Phidippides: "When he began to fondle the fweet babe, "And taking him by th' hand-Lambkin, fhe cried, "When thou art fome years older thou fhalt drive "Thy chariot to the city, rob'd in state "Like thy great ancestor Megacles-No; "Not fo, quoth I, but thou fhalt drive thy goats, "When thou art able, from the fields of Phelle, "Clad in a woolly jacket like thy father; "But he is deaf to all these frugal rules, "And drives me on the gallop to my ruin : "Therefore all night I call my thoughts to council, "And after long debate find one chance left, "To which if I can lead him, all is fafe; "If not-But foft! 'Tis time that I should wake him ; "But how to foothe him is the task-Phidippides! "Precious Phidippides ! "Kifs me, my boy! Reach me thine hand! PHIDIPPIDES. "Ah me! "What wou'd you? STREPSIADES. Tell me, Sirrah, doft thou love me? PHIDIPPIDES. PHIDIPPIDES. "Aye, be content; by Neptune's felf I fwear it! "Neptune, the patron of the equeftrian race. STREPSIADES. "Ah! name not him; name not that chariotteer, "That God, who is my bane; but, oh, my fon! "If thou indeed doft love, hear and obey me. ""Tis well; get up! come hither, boy! Look out-"Yon little wicket and the hut hard by"Doft thou not fee them? PHIDIPPIDES. "Yes, I do: What then? STREPSIADES. "Why, that's the council-chamber of all wifdom; "There the great fophifts meet and teach the world, "That heav'ns high firmament is one vaft oven, "And men its burning embers: Thefe are they, "Who can teach pleaders how to twift a cause, "So you'll but pay them for it, right or wrong. PHIDIPPIDES, "But how do you call 'em? STREPSIADES. "Troth, I know not that: "But "But they are men, who take a world of pains, "Wond'rous good men and able. PHIDIPPIDES "Out upon 'em! "Poor rogues! I know 'em now; you mean those scabs, "Thofe fqualid, barefoot, beggarly enthufiafts, "The mighty Cacodæmons of whose sect "Are Socrates and Cheriphon-Away! STREPSIADES. "Hush, hufh, be ftill! don't vent fuch foolish prattle, "But, if you'll take my counsel, join their college "And quit your riding-school. PHIDIPPIDES. "Not I, by Bacchus ! "No; not for all Leogaras's ftud. STREPSIADES. "Come, my dear boy, my darling lad,` confent ; I prythee do and learn!' PHIDIPPIDES. "What fhall I learn? STREPSIADES. "They have a choice of logic; this for juftice, PHIDIPPIDES. "I'll learn of no fuch masters, nor be made STREPSIADES. "Out of my doors then! You and your fine cattle PHIDIPPIDES. "Do your worst ! "I'll to my uncle, to my noble uncle : (exit.) STREPSIADES (STREPSIADES alone.) "He has thrown me to the ground, but I'll not lie "there: “I'll up, and with permiffion of the Gods "Try if I cannot learn these arts myself: "But being old, fluggish and dull of wit, "How am I fure thefe fubtilties won't pose me? "Well, I'll attempt it: What avails complaint? "Why don't I knock and enter?-Hoa! within there! (Knocks violently at Socrates's door, a difciple calls out from within.) DISCIPLE. "Go hang yourself, and give the crows a dinner! "What noify fellow art thou at the door? STREPSIADES. "Strepfiades of Cicynna, son of Phidon. DISCIPLE. "You're mad methinks to kick up fuch a riot; "Battering the door, you've batter'd out my brains "Juft in the very crifis of projection. (Comes from the boufe.) STREPSIADES. "Excufe my ignorance; I'm country-bred: "But tell me what rare thought your brains were "hatching. DISCIPLE. "That were not lawful to reveal to ftrangers. STREPSIADES. "Speak boldly then as to a fellow ftudent; "For therefore am I come. DISCIPLE. "Then I will fpeak ; "But fet it down amongst our myfteries- "It is a question put to Cherephon "By our great mafter Socrates to anfwer- STREPSIADES. |