that I was on last season, three or four of the gentlemen quarreled (pass the wine, if you please), and one of them, in the scrimmage, was knocked over the rocks into the sea."

Mercy on us, Mr. Sharpe ! was he drowned ?"

"Why, no, but his collar-bone was broken, and his shoulder dislocated. But a worse accident happened coming home." "What was it?"

"Poor Singleton had come, with his wife and two nieces, in a job carriage; the driver got drunk, and overturned the whole concern, just where the road branches off down to the strand; they rolled over the cliff, and fell about twenty feet; the horses were both killed, and the whole party dreadfully injured, barely escaping with life. Then, the quarrel after dinner (by which Jones got his collar-bone broken) led to a duel on the following morning, in which one of the parties, Edwards, fell; and his antagonist, young O'Neill, got a bullet in his knee, which has lamed and disfigured him for life. Pass the wine, gentlemen."

"No! no! no!" screamed Mrs. Harvey, on whom the above delectable recital had had the desired effect, and who was worked into a desperate state of terror, “no more wine, gentlemen, if you please. Come, ladies, we must return at once, before evening closes in."

Each lady being perfectly satisfied that the gentleman who had fallen to her lot would keep sober, whatever others might do, demurred to the early retreat; but Mrs. Harvey was too much frightened at the prospect of returning with gentlemen and drivers drunk, not to be determined; and, accordingly, with much growling, and the most general dissatisfaction, the party broke up.

"I am done with pic-nics—I'll never have anything to say to one again," said the disappointed directress. "There never was any affair more perfectly arranged, never was so much care taken to have things regular. I never proposed to myself such enjoyment as I expected this day."

"My dear Mrs. Harvey," said O'Gorman, to whose countenance the last four or five shells of wine had imparted an air of

the most profound wisdom, "my dear Mrs. Harvey, 'the whole art of happiness is contentment. This is the great secret of enjoyment in this life--this is the talisman that clothes poverty in imperial robes, and imparts to the hovel a grandeur unknown to the halls of princes-this is the true philosopher's stone, for which. alchemists so long have sought in vain, that converts all it touches into gold--this is the cosmetic that beautifies the ill-favored wife, and the magic wand that bestows upon the frugal board the appearance of surpassing plenty-this is the shield of adamantine proof, on which disappointment vainly showers its keenest dartsthis is the impregnable fortress, ensconced in which, we may boldly bid defiance to the combined forces of sublunary ills-and whether it be announced from the pulpit or the cliff, by the dignified divine or the college scamp; be it soothingly whispered in the ear of the deposed and exiled monarch, or tendered as comfort to the discomfited authoress of a pic-nic, it still retains, in undiminished force, its universality of application”

Here Mr. Sweeny facetiously gave him a slap on the crown of the hat, which drove it down, and stuck it gracefully over his eye, thereby breaking the thread of his discourse. He then addressed the fair Catherine; but all his eloquence and profundity were unavailing to induce her to return with him in the gig. She would listen to nothing but the carriage, and as room could not be made for him inside, he mounted the box, leaving the gig to any one that pleased to have it. Nor was it long untenanted. Frank Costello and Bill Nowlan mounted together, and were found in it next morning fast asleep, in the stable-lane behind Mr. Sharpe's house, the horse having found his way home when left to his own guidance.

The remainder of the party arrived as safely, but somewhat more regularly, in the evening of their eventful day, and all dissatisfied except Mr. O'Gorman.

THE IRISH PARLIAMENT AND THE TURK.

Until England dragged the sister kingdom with herself into the ruinous expenses of the American War, Ireland owed no debt. There were no taxes, save local ones; the Irish Parliament, being composed of resident gentlemen interested in the prosperity and welfare of their country, was profuse in promoting all useful schemes; and no projector who could show any reasonable grounds for seeking assistance, had difficulty in find. ing a patron.

Amongst other projectors whose ingenuity was excited by this liberal conduct, was one of a very singular description—a Turk who had come over, or, as the on dit went, had fled from Constantinople. He proposed to establish, what was greatly wanted at that time in the Irish metropolis, "hot and cold sea-water baths," and, by way of advancing his pretensions to public encouragement, offered to open free baths for the poor on an extensive plan, giving them, as a doctor, attendance and advice gratis every day in the year. He spoke English very intelligibly; his person was extremely remarkable, and the more so as he was the first Turk who had ever walked the streets of Dublin in his native costume. He was in height considerably above six feet, rather pompous in his gait, and apparently powerful; an immense black beard covering his chin and upper lip. There was at the same time something cheerful and cordial in the man's address, and, altogether, he cut a very imposing figure. Everybody liked Doctor Achmet Borumborad; his Turkish dress, being extremely handsome, without an approach to the tawdry, and crowned with an immense turban, drew the eyes of every passer-by, and

I must say that I have never seen a more stately looking Turk since that period.

The eccentricity of the doctor's appearance was, indeed, as will be readily imagined, the occasion of much idle observation and conjecture. At first, whenever he went abroad, a crowd of people, chiefly boys, was sure to attend him, but at a respectful distance; and if he turned to look behind him, the gaping boobies fled, as if they conceived even his looks to be mortal. These fears, however, gradually wore away, and were entirely shaken off on the fact being made public that he meant to attend the poor; which undertaking was, in the usual spirit of exaggeration, soon construed into an engagement, on the part of the doctor, to cure all disorders whatever! and hence he quickly became as much admired and respected as he had previously been dreaded.

My fair readers will perhaps smile when I assure them that the persons who seemed to have the least apprehension of Doctor Borumborad, or rather to think him "a very nice Turk," were the ladies of the metropolis. Many a smart, snug little husband, who had been heretofore considered "quite the thing," despotic in his own house, and peremptory commandant of his own family, was now regarded as a wretched, contemptible, closeshaven pigmy, in comparison with the immensity of the doctor's figure and whiskers; and what is more extraordinary, his good humor and engaging manners gained him many friends even among the husbands themselves! he thus becoming, in a shorter period than could be imagined, a particular favorite with the entire city, male and female.

Doctor Achmet Borumborad having obtained footing thus far, next succeeded surprisingly in making his way amongst the members of Parliament. He was full of conversation, yet knew his proper distance; pregnant with anecdote, but discreet in its expenditure; and he had the peculiar talent of being humble without the appearance of humility. A submissive Turk would have been out of character, and a haughty one excluded from society: the doctor was aware of this, and regulated his demeanor with remarkable skill upon every occasion-and they were nu.

merous-whereon, as a "lion," he was invited to the tables of the great. By this line of conduct he managed to warm those who patronized him into violent partisans; and accordingly little or no difficulty was experienced in getting a grant from Parliament for a sufficient fund to commence his great metropolitan undertaking.

Baths were now planned after Turkish models. The money voted was most faithfully appropriated; and a more ingenious or useful establishment could not be found in any metropolis. But the cash, it was soon discovered, ran too short to enable the doctor to complete his scheme; and on the ensuing session a further vote became necessary, which was by no means opposed, as the institution was good, fairly executed, and charitably applied. The worthy doctor kept his ground-session after session he petitioned for fresh assistance, and never met with refusal; his profits were good, and he lived well; whilst the baths proved of the utmost benefit, and the poor received attention and service from his establishment without cost. An immense cold bath was constructed to communicate with the river; it was large and deep, and entirely renewed every tide. The neatest lodging rooms for those patients who chose to remain during a course of bathing were added to the establishment, and always occupied. In short, the whole affair became so popular, and Doctor Achmet acquired so many friends, that the annual grants of Parliament were considered nearly as matters of course.

But alas! fortune is treacherous, and prosperity unstable. Whilst the ingenious Borumborad was thus rapidly flourishing, an unlucky though most ludicrous incident threw the poor fellow completely aback, and, without any fault on his part, nearly ruined both himself and his institution.

Preparatory to every session it was the doctor's invariable custom to give a grand dinner at the baths to a large number of his patrons, members of Parliament who were in the habit of proposing and supporting his grants. He always on these occasions procured some professional singers, as well as the finest wines in Ireland, endeavoring to render the parties as joyous and convivial