PART II. ANECDOTES AND SAYINGS OF JOHNSON. SELECTED FROM HAWKINS.* 197. Portable Books. 66 DR. JOHNSON used to say, that no man read long together with a folio on his table. Books," said he, “that you may carry to the fire, and hold readily in your hand, are the most useful after all." He would say, "such books form the mass of general and easy reading." He was a great friend to books like the French "Esprits d'un tel;" for example, "Beauties of Watts," &c. &c.: "at which," said he, "a man will often look and be tempted to go on, when he would have been frightened at books of a larger size, and of a more erudite appearance. 198. Conversation. He had a great opinion of the knowledge procured by conversation with intelligent and ingenious persons. His first question concerning such as had that character was ever, "What is his conversation?" 198. Christian Religion. The Duke of*** † once said to Johnson, that "every * [Sir John Hawkins published, in 1787, his Life of Johnson; and, in the same year, superintended an edition of the Doctor's Works, in eleven volumes octavo. From these publications the present selection has been made.] + [The Duc de Chaulnes. See post, No. 399.] religion had a certain degree of morality in it." "Ay, my lord," answered he, "but the Christian religion alone puts it on its proper basis." 200. Learned Ladies.-Mrs. Carter. He used to say something tantamount to this: When a woman affects learning, she makes a rivalry between the two sexes for the same accomplishments, which ought not to be, their provinces being different. Milton said before him, "For contemplation he and valour form'd, And upon hearing a lady of his acquaintance commended. for her learning, he said, “A man is in general better pleased when he has a good dinner upon his table than when his wife talks Greek. My old friend, Mrs. Carter," he added, "could make a pudding as well as translate Epictetus from the Greek, and work a handkerchief as well as compose a poem." He thought, however, that she was too reserved in conversation upon subjects she was so eminently able to converse upon, which was occasioned by her modesty and fear of giving offence. 201. Rising in the World.-Foote. When some one was lamenting Foote's unlucky fate in being kicked, in Dublin, Johnson said he was glad of it. "He is rising in the world," said he: "when he was in England, no one thought it worth while to kick him.” 202. Precepts and Practice. To a person, who once said he paid little regard to those writers on religion or morality whose practice corresponded not with their precepts, he imputed a want of knowledge of mankind; saying, it was gross ignorance in him not to know, that good principles and an irregular life were consistent with each other. 203. Volubility. Of a member of parliament, who, after having harangued for some hours in the House of Commons, came into a company where Johnson was, and endeavoured to talk him down, he said, "This man has a pulse in his tongue." 204. Equality.-Mrs. Macaulay. Dr. Johnson and Dr. Sumner, of Harrow, were dining one day, with many other persons, at Mrs. Macaulay's.* She had talked a long time at dinner about the natural equality of mankind. Johnson, when she had finished her harangue, rose up from the table, and with great solemnity of countenance, and a bow to the ground, said to the servant, who was waiting behind his chair, "Mr. John, pray be seated in my place, and permit me to wait upon you in my turn: your mistress says, you hear, that we are all equal.' 205. Divine Service.—Dr. Dodd. "I am convinced," said he to a friend, "I ought to be present at divine service more frequently than I am; but the provocations given by ignorant and affected preachers, too often disturb the mental calm which otherwise would succeed to prayer. I am apt to whisper to myself on such occasions, How can this illiterate fellow dream of fixing attention, after we have been listening to the sublimest truths, conveyed in the most chaste and exalted language, throughout a liturgy which must be regarded as the genuine offspring of piety impregnated by wisdom! Take notice, however, though I make this confession respecting myself, I do not mean to recommend the fastidiousness that sometimes leads me to exchange congregational for solitary worship." He was at Streatham church when Dodd's first application to him was made, and went out of his pew immediately, to write an answer to the letter he had received. Afterwards, when he related this circumstance, he added, "I hope I shall be pardoned, if once I deserted the service of God for that of man."t 206. Physicians.. Johnson obeyed that precept of Scripture which exhorts us to honour the physician, and would frequently say of * [See Croker's Boswell, vol. i. pp. 225, 460.] + [Ibid., vol. iii. p. 508.] those of his own country, that they did more good to mankind, without a prospect of reward, than any profession of men whatever. 207. Romantic Virtue. Dr. Johnson said, he always mistrusted romantic virtue, as thinking it founded on no fixed principle. 208. Schoolmasters. Speaking of schoolmasters, he used to say they were worse than the Egyptian taskmasters of old. "No boy," says he, "is sure any day he goes to school to escape a whipping. How can the schoolmaster tell what the boy has really forgotten, and what he has neglected to learn; what he has had no opportunities of learning, and what he has taken no pains to get at the knowledge of? yet, for any of these, however difficult they may be, the boy is obnoxious to punishment." 209. Mystery. He used to say that where secrecy or mystery began, vice or roguery was not far off. 210. "Derange." He would not allow the verb derange, a word at present much in use, to be an English word. "Sir," said a gentleman who had some pretensions to literature, "I have seen it in a book." "Not in a bound book," said Johnson; "disarrange is the word we ought to use instead of it.* 211. Hugh Kelly. When some one asked him whether they should introduce Hugh Kelly, the author, to him-"No, sir," says he, "I never desire to converse with a man who has written more than he has read:" yet when his play was acted for the benefit of his widow, Johnson furnished a prologue. * [Even so late as the year 1795, a writer in the British Critic censured, as a gallicism, Mr. Burke's use of derange for disarrange.-C.] 212. The Early Puritans. Of the early Puritans, he thought their want of learning was atoned for by their skill in the Scriptures, and the holiness of their lives; and to justify his opinion of them and their writings, he once cited to me a saying of Howell, in one of his letters, that to make a man a complete Christian, he must have the works of a Papist, the words of a Puri-. tan, and the faith of a Protestant. 213. Happiness. He thought the happiest life was that of a man of business, with some literary pursuits for his amusement; and that, in general, no one could be virtuous or happy that was not completely employed. 214. George Psalmanazar. He had never, he said, seen the close of the life of any one that he wished so much his own to resemble, as that of Psalmanazar* for its purity and devotion. He told many anecdotes of him; and said he was supposed, by his accent, to have been a Gascon; but that he spoke English with the city accent, and coarse enough. He for some years spent his evenings at a public-house near Old Street, where many persons went to talk with him. When Dr. Johnson was asked whether he ever contradicted Psalmanazar, "I should as soon," said he, "have thought of contradicting a bishop:" so high did he hold his character in the latter part of his life. When he was asked whether he ever mentioned Formosa before him, he said, "he was afraid to mention even China." 215. Improvement. Johnson was in the habit of visiting Psalmanazar, and would frequently adjourn with him from his lodgings to a neighbouring alehouse, and, in the common room, converse with him on subjects of importance. In one of these conversations, Johnson took occasion to remark on the human mind, that it had a necessary tendency to improvement, and that it would frequently anticipate instruction, and ena * [See antè, p. 69.] |