descent from the kings who ruled in Britain long before the Conquest. This grand claim. (which was quoted at page 28) has since been rather spoilt by the plain statement that Alfred Tennyson's grandfather was a country attorney, practising in a small, quiet way in Market Rasen, North Lincolnshire, who, having made money in his business, retired, and bought some. land in the neighbourhood. But for the title just conferred upon him, Tennyson's birth and lineage would have been. matters of perfect indifference to his readers. As for raising Tennyson to the peerage, no writer seems seriously to have defended an act which most people look upon as a mistake. Not one parody in its favour has been written, but many against it. You must wake and call me early, call me early, Vicky dear, For to-morrow will be the silliest day we've seen for many a year; For I am a rhyming prig, Vicky, that shoddy and sham reveres, So I'm to be one of the Peers, Vicky, I'm to be one of the Peers. There's many a crazy lyre, they say, but none so effete as mine; It cannot ring out an ode to Brown, that gallant gilly of thine, For there's none so inane as poor old Alf in his sad, declining years; And I'm to be one of the Peets, Vicky, I'm to be one of the Peers. I sleep so sound all night, Vicky, that I shall never wake; So come in the early morn, Vicky, and give me a slap and a shake; For I must gather my scissors and paste and scraps of the bygone years, And I'm to be one of the Peers, Vicky, I'm to be one of the Peers. As I came up the Row, Vicky, whom think you I should see? Lord Queensberry against a lamp, and singing Tweedle-dedee: He thought of that vile play, Vicky, I wrote in bygone years; But I'm to be one of the Peers, Vicky, I'm to be one of the Peers. He thought I was a fool, Vicky, for I looked dazed and white; He took me for a fool, Vicky-by jingo, he was right. They call me Atheist-hater; but I care not for their jeers, For I'm to be one of the Peers, Vicky, I'm to be one of the Peers. They say men write, and all for love; but this can never be : They say that great men write and starve; but what is that to me? For gold I sell my laughter, for gold I sell my tears, And I'm to be one of the Peers, Vicky, I'm to be one of Of Tennyson's Patriotic Poems The Charge of the Light Brigade has always been the most popular, and has, consequently, been the most frequently parodied. An excellent parody, taken from Puck on Pegasus, was given on page 31; the following are the most interesting examples which remain to be quoted:- THE INSTITUTION OF MECHANICAL ENGINEERS. On Thursday, August 3, 1865, an excursion was made by the Members of the Institution of Mechanical Engineers of England, to the Dublin Corporation Waterworks at the Stillorgan and Roundwood Reservoirs. The members proceeded from Bray through the Glen of the Downs, along a portion of the line of pipes, and at the Roundwood Reservoir they were hardsomely entertained by Sir John Gray, M.P., the Chairman of the Waterworks Committee, and The following parody appeared in a Dublin newspaper a few days later. Dr. Waller, who is mentioned in it, was then the Chairman of the Connoree Copper and Sulphur Mines, in the Vale of Avoca, which were also visited by the party of Engineers :- THE TWO HUNDRED. (After Tennyson's "Charge of the Light Brigade.") 'Half-past nine, August three-Half-past nine-onward! Off to the Vartry Works Went some two hundred. Off to the Vartry Works, Where the good water lurks, Down on the Wicklow line, Thinking of how they'd dine; Toasting,' with best of wine, Off-with the weather fine Went the two hundred. "Forward!' said Sir John Gray, 'Waller has blundered.' But they were wrong, to doubt- On from the station there, Through Wicklow's mountain air Drove the two hundred. A cat on the right of him! What if he blunder'd? All the "Half-hundred!" The following clever parody was given to me, about ten years ago, by a young Scotch friend. who has since gone to New Zealand. I have no clue to the year in which it was written (the day of the month, however, was carefully preserved), nor do I know by whom it was written, nor where it made its first appearance in public. Will any kind correspondent furnish me with information on these points? THE DOCTOR'S HEAVY BRIGADE. "They would scarcely believe him when he told them that when in Thurso, some time ago, he on one occasion saw six hundred people asleep in a church." Speech of Dr. Guthrie, October 26th. O'er their devoted heads, While the law thunder'd, Snugly and heedlessly Snored the Six Hundred ! Great was the preacher's theme; Screw'd on was all the steam; Neither with shout nor scream Could he disturb the dream Of the Six Hundred ! Terrors to right of them! At the dumb-founder'd! Snor'd the Six Hundred ; Still, with redoubled zeal, Called them the Church's foes, Of the Six Hundred ! L'ENVOY. Sermons of near an hour, Wofully blundered). With a service of music, Through which they floundered. As the Six Hundred ! THE CHARGE OF THE BLACK BRIGADE.* Half a day, half a day, Sped the clocks onward, While in Freemason's Hall Roared the six hundred !— Frantic the Black Brigade, "Charge for the Church!" they said, In the Freemason's Hall Roared the six hundred ! Frantic the Black Brigade, Fearful the row they made, Some day they'll know too well How they have blundered. Theirs not to hear reply, Theirs throat and lungs to try, Theirs to bawl "Low" and "High," Round the Archbishop's chair Roared the seven hundred ! Canons to right of him, Canons to left of him, Canons in front of him, Shouted and thundered! Stormed at with groan and yell, Howls by the hundred ! Flustered the laymen's hair; York's prelate wonderedGuides of us sinner folk Apropos of the clamorous meeting of the Clergy, in Freemason s Hall, December, 1863, the Archbishop of York in the Chair. 1439 votes Precept and law they broke, Curate and rector spoke, Dealing the Church a stroke Shaken and sundered- Then they divided, and Lost the six hundred ! Clergy to right of chair, Shouted and thundered! Went blessed, and out of breath, Back to their flocks to tell All that was done by them- When will the scandal fade Why such a noise was made All by the Church BrigadeBlind fourteen hundred ! IV. Balls to the right of me! Bounded and thundered! From Lays of Modern Oxford, 1874. Punch, 1868. AT THE MAGDALEN GROUND. Ecce canit formas alius jactusque pilarum. I. DRIVE to the Magdalen Ground ; Soon myself there I found, Balls flew, and ground boys After them blundered! Theirs not at ease to lie, Who could have wondered? II. Balls to the right of me! Nearly a hundred ! There stood each cricket swell, III. Thirsty, with elbows bare, Why no one's head was broke, Fast the balls thundered; Which, had they hit him, would The following is a fair specimen of the Puff Poetical, taken from the Daily News of January, 1878: CHARGE OF THE FAIR BRIGADE. With the Junior Partner's Apologies to Mr. Tennyson. Half a league, half a league, Half a league onward, All on the underground line Rode the six hundred. Right! cried the guard of the train; Glide the six hundred. Forward the bright brigade! Came the six hundred. Dighted and lumbered; Greeted with chair and grace Into the "Sale" amain Went the six hundred. Flash'd all their note-books fair, Flash'd all the pencils there, Noting with all due care, All the world wondered; Plunged in the "Hibernum Sale," Pleased with each neat detail; Silken and Linen Metre and yard-stick fail Almost to measure. Then they hark back, but not - Not unencumbered. Voices at right of him! Question'd and thunder'd ! Shrunk I into my shell; I was thus found to buy Coals by the "Hundred!" How does one's glory fade, When there an end is made At what the world wonder'd? Ne'er from my mind will fade That awkward mess we made, Of the "Half-hundred!" JAMES BRUTON. (From the Stratford-on-Avon Herald.) The following clever parody was given to me, about ten years ago, by a young Scotch friend. who has since gone to New Zealand. I have no clue to the year in which it was written (the day of the month, however, was carefully preserved), nor do I know by whom it was written, nor where it made its first appearance in public. Will any kind correspondent furnish me with information on these points? THE DOCTOR'S HEAVY BRIGADE. "They would scarcely believe him when he told them that when in Thurso, some time ago, he on one occasion saw six hundred people asleep in a church." Speech of Dr. Guthrie, October 26th. O'er their devoted heads, While the law thunder'd, Snugly and heedlessly Snored the Six Hundred ! Great was the preacher's theme; Screw'd on was all the steam; Neither with shout nor scream Could he disturb the dream Of the Six Hundred ! Terrors to right of them! Terrors in front of them! At the dumb-founder'd ! Snor'd the Six Hundred ; Still, with redoubled zeal, Striking with hand and heel, Called them the Church's foes, Of the Six Hundred ! L'ENVOY. Sermons of near an hour, Wofully blundered). Should it be wondered? Churches that will not move Out of the ancient groove Through which they floundered. If they will lag behind, Still must expect to find Hearers of such a kind As the Six Hundred ! THE CHARGE OF THE BLACK BRIGADE.* Half a day, half a day, Roared the six hundred !- Roared the six hundred ! Frantic the Black Brigade, Fearful the row they made, Some day they'll know too well How they have blundered. Theirs not to hear reply, Theirs throat and lungs to try, Theirs to bawl "Low" and "High," Round the Archbishop's chair Roared the seven hundred ! Canons to right of him, Canons to left of him, Canons in front of him, Shouted and thundered! Stormed at with groan and yell, Really they stood it well, Howls by the hundred ! Flustered the laymen's hair; Hooting and hissing, while York's prelate wonderedGuides of us sinner folk Apropos of the clamorous meeting of the Clergy, in Freemason s Hall, December, 1868, the Archbishop of York in the Chair. 1439 votes |