Written for the Ladies' Garland. During several unceremonious visits, Mrs. DISAPPOINTMENT OF THE HEART: Sinclair endeavored, by frequent hints of her OR, DISOBEDIENCE TO PARENTS PUNISHED. own unhappiness, to win the confidence of her fair young neighbor. At length she resolved to divide her own sorrows by confiding them to her friend, whose secresy and sym fided in. She accordingly paid a visit to her; it was in the early part of June when all the world is love and beauty. Seated with Mrs. Howard in the little parlor, fragrant with the breath of the bright blooms that looked smilingly in at the windows, the ladies held communion of sorrow, until at length Mrs. Sinclair thus commenced her own history:— Mr. and Mrs. Sinclair were a beautiful couple; and if wealth, with its accompani-pathy she was confident might be wholly conments of luxury, elegance, and honor, can bestow happiness, they were certainly happy. It was said that they loved each other sincerely; and treated each other with great deference and politeness on all occasions. They were accounted a pattern couple; a lord and lady to be envied. Yet they had buried two beautiful little ones, each in the first month of their existence, and a cloud, which dwelt ever on Mrs. Sinclair's beautiful countenance, was attributed to grief for their loss. This was only natural, and Mrs. Sinclair expressed the most perfect submission and resignation on the subject. Their intimate friends, however, sometimes shook their heads, and hinted at something wrong between them, which the world regarded as a barefaced slander. This is a truth, however; the lady was fond of seclusion, and lonely rambles, and was often seen weeping in a green bower, or beside a babbling brook, and yet she was no poetess. There certainly was mystery in this; for Mr. Sinclair was either a kind and tender husband, or a consummate hypocrite, for he always treated his wife with delicate affection. An uncommonly severe winter had just resigned his dominion, and spring had smiled away the ice and snow-drifts from the bosom of the earth, which began to put forth here and there a tuft of green, or a cluster of early flowers, in token of awakening warmth and love. Mrs. Sinclair walked alone in the field and grove, answering with sighs the carol of the blue bird, and dewing with tears the meek sweet blossoms. Raising at length her downcast eyes, she observed standing pensively beside a stream, half concealed by the budding streamers of an old weeping willow, against the trunk of which she supported her delicate and apparently feeble frame, a lady, in whose sorrow marked beauty and sad tender eyes, she instantly recognized a kindred spirit. An acquaintance was easily commenced between them, and they found great consolation in sighing and weeping in company. Mrs. Sinclair soon paid a visit to her sister in affliction; alas, although their spirits were kindred, there seemed no affinity in their worldly cir cumstances. Mrs. Howard dwelt in a small cottage, with no other companion than a young country girl, who performed the duties of maid and footman. Mrs. Sinclair, however, insisted that an intimacy should exist between them, and accordingly it was established. "I have not long to remain a denizen of this vale of sorrow, my dear friend; I am dying of a concealed and therefore more surely fatal disease. No balm can reach my wound; no soothing take away my pain. I bear in my bosom a crushed and bleeding heart. I have loved-ah! too fervently. Heaven only knows how truly I still worship at a forbidden shrine. I know that you will sympathize with my sorrows, for I feel instinctively that you are also suffering from a disappointment of the heart. At the early age of seventeen, I met at a public ball one whom my heart did homage to. He was the perfection of manly beauty; his education was superior; his address captivating; his wit brilliant. I attracted his attention, and the admiration which I felt for him was fully reciprocated; yet for many days I sighed over his cherished idea in hopelessness of ever meeting him again. My health began gradually to decline, and a fixed melancholy to shadow my natural cheerful spirit. My physician advised exercise in the open air, on horseback. It was near a month after that memorable ball, that, as I was riding with a bevy of young companions along the river road, my horse suddenly took fright, and rearing and plunging, seemed about to precipitate himself and me into the swollen stream. At this moment a gentleman sprang from a passing carriage, and rescued me from my perilous situation. I fainted in his arms, and you may judge of my surprise and joy when, on my recovery, I found that my deliverer was him whom I so ardently loved. He accompanied me home, and for several days continued his visits, until I found myself irrevocably his. Before, however, he made any declaration of the love which beamed in his eye and spoke in every gesture, my father commanded me to break off all intimacy with him. Some envious creature had traduced the noble youth, and my father gave heed to the vile slander; and when I refused to pierce his heart by a cold and haughty demeanor, my proud and punctilious father gave him plainly to understand, that his visits 66 would thereafter be considered unwelcome proposed to imitate her by recounting her own intrusions, and also hinted at the aspersions sorrows. which lay upon his character. In all the My history," she said, "is very similar in agony of offended pride, and a wounded yet its opening to yours. I, too, am a rich man's lofty spirit, the insulted gentleman bade me daughter and delicately educated. I, too, an everlasting farewell. Oh! the fearful was fascinated by a dazzling stranger, of agony of that hour! The iron then entered whose address my father in his wisdom disinto my soul. I sunk under the leaden bur- approved. But I had been spoiled by indulden of despair. For several weeks a delirious gence; I would not listen to parental advice. fever held me on the brink of the dark river of My lover was all perfection in my opinion, death. This insensibility undoubtedly pro- and so ardent was his worship, that I felt as longed my life; for when at length the fever if his life depended on my love. How could left me, my mind and body were so debilita- I treat him with cruelty? with what words ted, that even the dark current of despair could I answer the sophistry of love, while flowed feebly on. It was long before I re- my own heart echoed every syllable? My covered sufficiently to go out, and when I did, parents remained inexorable. Oh! I had a the deep melancholy that shadowed my in- dear good mother, who loved me as mothers valid beauty, awoke a deeper feeling than only love. She plead with me to tear that admiration in all that looked upon me. Mr. new-pledged love from my bosom; she asSinclair soon professed himself my lover. sured me that its object was unworthy, and He was unexceptionable, as his fortune, cha- I accused her of cruelty and malevolence, racter, and person were all above mediocrity. and told her plainly that I considered my My father urged me to accept his hand, and lover my best friend. She clasped her hands in the heartlessness of my despair, I consent- and wept bitterly. Those tears! Oh! they ed to become his bride. Oh! could I have lie like fire coals on my heart, although at the known before the irrevocable knot was tied, time I felt them not. Well, I consented to that which I learned only too soon after that a clandestine union;-but as the day apfatal day, I should have escaped at least the proached in which I had promised to fly with keen remorse that has added its venom to the my beloved, I felt agony indescribable. To bitter fountains that has ever since bathed leave the home in which I had dwelt from my bosom. I had been only a few weeks infancy-to forsake my ever kind and indulmarried; the bridal festivities had hardly gent parents-to leave behind me all my passed away, when, as I was rummaging an girlhood's treasures, was a severe trial; yet old secretary, my eye fell on a letter, the I did not once doubt the love and constancy superscription of which arrested my attention. of my lover, who assured me that my father It was from the lord of my heart. It was would soon forgive, and receive us into favor. received during my illness, and my father, He did not know him as well as I did, or after reading it, and resolving to keep it from he would not have hoped a speedy pardon. my knowledge, threw it carelessly aside. It The hour arrived. I made a pretence to go breathed the most ardent love, the most un-out a few hours. When I was dressed I linwavering constancy. He besought me to remain true to him a little while, until he could confront his accusers with unanswerable evidence, and claim me triumphantly of my punctilious father. He concluded with a solemn assurance, that he would never love or marry another, and besought of me an immediate answer, saying, that if he received it not in ten days, he should embark for the Indies, beneath the pestilent climate of which|| his broken heart would probably soon find rest. Oh! my friend, is there any balm for a heart lacerated like mine? The world deems me happy, and truly I possess a large share of its treasures and its baubles. My husband-I shudder as I speak that word-is all that I could desire a man to be; yet this eternal canker in my heart robs me of repose and peace." Long did the pensive friends mingle their tears and sighs. At length Mrs. Howard, after essaying all her powers of consolation, until Mrs. Sinclair became somewhat calm, gered in my chamber, I felt an invisible power withholding me from my purpose.The clock struck. I knew that he awaited me; I crossed the hall hurriedly. Mother sat in the parlor; 'you will be back to dinner?' she asked. Yes, ma'm; good morning,' I faltered, and my father's doors closed upon me forever. I found my lover waiting at the place of rendezvous. With gentle chidings for my tears, mingled with his thanks and exultation, he placed me in his carriage and we set forward. We were united. He placed me in elegant lodgings, until his house should be ready for our reception; he was very kind and attentive; but I knew no peace, no moment of unalloyed happiness. I was soon convinced that I should have been happier with my parents without him, than with him without my parents. It is sufficiently afflictive to forsake all the sweet tender sympathies of home, when we carry with us the paternal blessing; but to go as I did, to throw all aside for the love of a stranger. Oh! 'the way of transgressors is was a gambler; and when I thought to secure hard!' I was ill. Where was my anxious the little sum sent me by my father, I found mother with her ceaseless cares and blessed it gone, together with my purse and every soothing! My husband had me well attend-article of jewelry that had been mine, even ed, but those who nursed me loved me not, to my mother's miniature. But I was getand there was no balm in their ministrations.ting accustomed to misery in all its forms. He was out all day attending to his business, I only clasped my hands and sighed. I never which he said was imperious; and although spoke to him about it, nor did he ever refer to he inquired fondly of my state when he came the subject. As soon as I could be up he home, I felt that there is no love like a mo- told me that I must learn to wait upon myself ther's. I wrote to my parents immediately now, for he could not afford to keep a serafter my elopement, and looked with great vant. Then came my trials. I knew nothanxiety for the letter which should recall me ing of housekeeping. I was obliged to ask to their arms. After several weeks had information and assistance of my poor neigh. elapsed, my husband brought a large packet bors, who, as I soon learned, shrank from my from the post-office. My heart paused as I society, under the impression that I was not took it. I knew that it was not the heart- an honest married woman, as they expressed warm message of pardon and peace. My it. Was I not humbled then! I, the proud, husband was anxious to know what it con- the delicate, the classically educated, obliged tained, or I do not know how long it might||to solicit instruction and assistance, and even have remained sealed. Its contents were a to ask the names of kitchen utensils, and the letter from my mother, penned in the agony common terms of housewifery, of the low and of a bereaved heart, yet breathing pardon and ignorant, while they shrank from an intimacy warm wishes for my happiness, with much with me, as from a hideous contagion. Oh, advice for my conduct in my new station, I was miserable then. At length my husand an everlasting farewell. My father wrote band told me that I must write to my pacoldly and haughtily; enclosed one thousand rents, and solicit pecuniary aid. This I dollars, assuring me that I should never re- absolutely refused to do. Then the demon ceive another cent, another letter, or any of his nature revealed itself. Such scenes notice whatever from him. Notwithstanding as then transpired! their shadows even now the depth of my affliction, I could not but ob- are hideous to me. At length he added to serve that my husband expressed more chag- all the injuries which he had heaped upon me rin than sorrow. I sought to soothe the bit- in return for my love and confidence, by deterness which he evidently felt against my serting me utterly. Then in my helplessfather, when he angrily rebuked me, thus ness I wrote to my mother; I told her all that adding to the measure of my misery. As had befallen me, and entreated her to write soon as I was sufficiently recovered from the me one word of consolation, and tell me what shock to sit up, he told me that since I was I should do. Two weeks elapsed and then I an outcast I must be content with a more received another packet, directed in my fahumble lodging. 'Merciful God!' I cried, ther's hand, enclosing another one thousand 'what annunciation comes next?' 'Why,' dollars, and a letter from my mother. Dear he continued, you may as well know it all Mrs. Sinclair, judge my agony as I read my at once. The gentleman who possesses the father's letter. He said he trusted that I treasure of your heart and hand is a poor pen- had learned the certainty of the sentence niless being, living by his wits, which, by the which he once read to me out of the Holy way, have led him into one bad speculation.' Book, “He that forsaketh his father is cursed I sunk, not so much under the horror of the of God." He forgave me, however, from his disclosure, as the taunting heartlessness of heart, although my heartless desertion had his words. A brain fever seized me, and hurried my mother to the grave. She died. when I recovered to consciousness, I found three months after my elopement, leaving myself a tenant of a little hut in the suburbs the enclosed letter, which I should have reof the city, attended by a dirty creature, whose ceived immediately could my residence have low conversation shocked me exceedingly. been discovered. He advised me to purchase I inquired for my husband, and was told that myself a humble home, and commence school he would be home by midnight. He came, teaching, or some other business by which I however, by nine o'clock; seemed really might gain a livelihood; said, if I behaved pleased to see me better, and sat by me until with prudence, he would some day make me morning. Desolate and miserable as I was, another remittance; bade me write to him I felt to bless him for the kind words that fell when I was settled, and concluded by saying from his tongue; and having no other rest that he had a second wife, and a lovely inmy heart clung to him closer than ever. I fant son. I sat stupidly the whole day, with need not dwell on every incident of my the papers in my lap. I was bewildered, wretched life. I soon learned that my husband" dumb with grief and astonishment. It was not until the second day that I could fully "And have you heard nothing from Mr. Howard since he deserted you?" inquired Mrs. Sinclair. El "Howard is not my husband's name. len Howard is my christian name. After my degradation, I renounced my husband's name, neither did I dare assume the name of my father. My husband's name is MedwayFrederick Mortimer Medway." 66 99 mured, "to be assured that I possess the undivided heart of my beautiful wife. I can reproach her with no one fault, and yet there is a coldness and reserve in her manner that effectually prevents the mingling of our hearts." At that moment Mrs. Sinclair entered. With a sweet smile she approached and threw her arms confidingly around his neck— "I have come," she said, lovingly, "to proffer you the moiety of my heart which I have heretofore withholden from you." He clasped her to his heart with joyful surprise, and she told him unreservedly the story of her first love, and the disclosure made by Mrs. Howard. "Now," she said, in conclusion, "the delusion is dispelled, and I fly heart and soul to your bosom." Mr. and Mrs. Sinclair are now in reality happy; and she often laughingly tells to pining young ladies, the story of her Disappointment of the Heart! Written for the Ladies' Garland. BY MRS. MARY L. GARDINER. How often I've watched its green leaves as I lay, ""Tis my favorite plant, I will give it to you, Soon this young bud in beauty will bloom; Mighty God! Is it possible! O, Lord "Dear mother, sweet mother, take the Bible and read; Her Mary was gone that mother was wild! Her blood coursed cold through each vein. "Oh, how can I live in this cold world," she cried, "I have nothing on earth more to do." And quick to her Mary she flew. The tall grass waves mournfully over their tomb, Mr. Sinclair was sitting listlessly in his library; now gazing at the valuable and The wild rose is there, all fresh in its bloom, splendid arrangements of the room, then at the enchanting prospect of garden, field, and grove, which the high-arched windows commanded; at length he clasped his hands upon the table and laid his forehead on them with a deep sigh. And its fragrance is borne on the breeze. A more glorious victory cannot be obtained over another man than this, that when the injury began on his part, the kindness should "All these would I freely resign," he mur- begin on ours. |