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is worse, not of the same patterns; but as people , country when the gipsies have left, bat till then, I say, two Lincolnshire removes are as bad as a fire confine them to round the house, as it's no use of London.
shutting the stable door after you've had a child The first thing I did on coming down, was to see stole. We have a good many fine fields of hay, to the sweeps going up,—but I wish I had been which I mean to have reaped directly, wet or shine; less precipitous, for the sooty wretches stole four for delays are as dangerous as pickles in glazed paus. good flitches of bacon, as was up the kitchen chim- Perhaps St. Swithen's is in our favor, for if the ney, quite unbeknown to me. We have filled up stacks are put up dampish they won't catch fire so the vacancy with more, which smoke us dreadfully, easily, if Swing should come into these parts. The but what is to be cured must be endured. My next poor boys have made themselves very industrious thing was to have all holes and corners cleared out, in shooting off the birds, and hunting away all the and washed, and scrubbed, being left, like bache- vermin, besides cutting down trees. As I knew it lor's places, in a sad state by old single W.; for a was profitable to fell timber, I directed them to rich man, I never saw one that wanted so much begin with a very ugly straggling old hollow tree cleaning out. There were heaps of dung about, as next the premises, but it fell the wrong way, and high as baystacks, and it cost me five shillin a knocked down the cow-house. Luckily the poor "load to have it all carted off the premises; besides animals were all in the clover-field at the time. heaps of good-for-nothing littering straw, that I George says it wouldn't have happened but for a gave to the boys for bonfires. We are not all to violent sow, or rather sow-west, -and it's likely rights yet, but Rome wasn't built in St. Thomas's enough, but it's an ill wind that blows nothing to day.
nobody. It was providential I hampered myself with cold Having writ last post to Mr. P., I hare no occaprovisions, for except the bacon there were no eat- sion to make you a country commissioner. Anasables in the house. What old W. lived upon is a tasia, indeed, wants to have books about every mystery, except salads, for we found a whole field thing, but for my part and Dorothy's we don't put of beet-root, which, all but a few plants for Doro much faith in authorized receipts and directions, thy to pickle, I had chucked away. As the ground but trust more to nature and common sense. For was then clear for sowing up a crop, I directed instance, in fatting a goose, reason points to sage George to plough it up, but he met with agricul- and onions, --why our own don't thrive on it, is tural distress. Ile says as soon as he whipped his very mysterious. We have a beautiful poultry horses, the plough stuck its nose in the earth, and yard, only infested with rats,-- but I have made up tumbled over head and heels. It seems very odd a poison, that, I know by the poor ducks, will kill when ploughing is so easy to look at, but I trust he them if they eat it. will do better in time. Experience makes a King I expected to send you a quantity of wall-fruit, Solomon of a Tom noddy.
for preserving, and am sorry you bought the brandy I expect we shall have bushels upon bushels of beforehand, as it has all vanished in one night by corn, tho' sadly pecked by the birds, as I have had all the scarecrows taken down for fear of the children dreaming of them for Bogies. For the same dear little sakes I have had the well filled up, and the nasty sharp iron spikes drawn out of all the rakes and harrows. Nobody shall say to my teeth, I am not a good Mother.
With these precautions I trust the young ones will enjoy the
picking and stealing, notwithstanding I had ten dozen of bottles broke on purpose to stick a-top of the wall. But I rather think they came over the pales, as George, who is very thoughtless, had driven in all the new tenter hooks with the points
TIIE RAKE'S PROGRESS.
downwards. Our apples and pears would have | down on the footing of a friend, to visit my son gone too, but luckily we heard a noise in the dark, Richard, but hearing the newspapers read, quitted and threw brickbats out of the window, that alarm- suddenly, the same day with the gipsies, and we ed the thieves by smashing the cowcumber frames. haven't an idea what is become of him. Trusting However, I mean on Monday to make sure of the this statement will relieve of all anxiety, remain, orchard, by gathering the trees, -a pheasant in madam, your humble servant, one's hand is worth two cock sparrows in a bush.
BELINDA PUGSLEY. One comfort is, the house-dog is very vicious, and wont let any of us stir in or out after dark--indeed, No. VII.—To Mr. Silas PugslEY, Parisian Depot, nothing can be more furious, except the bull, and
Shoreditch. at me in particular. You would think he knew my inward thoughts, and that I intend to have him
Dear BROTHER,— My favor of the present date, roasted whole when we give our grand housewarm- is to advise of my safe arrival on Wednesday night, ing regalia.
per opposition coach, after ninety miles of discomWith these particulars, I remain, with love, my fort, absolutely unrivalled for cheapness, and a walk dear Dorcas, your affectionate sister,
of five miles more, through lanes and roads, that for BELINDA PUGSLEY.
dirt and sludge may confidently defy competition,
not to mention turnings and windings, too numerous P.S.—I have only one anxiety here, and that is, to particularize, but morally impossible to pursue the likelihood of being taken violently ill, nine on undeviating principles. The night was of so miles off from any physical powers, with nobody dark a quality as forbade finding the gate, but for that can ride in the house, and nothing but an in the house-dog flying upon me by mistake for the surmountable hunting horse in the stable. I should late respectable proprietor, and almost tearing my like, therefore, to be well doctor-stuff'd from Apo- clothes off my back by his strenuous exertions to thecaries' Hall, by the wagon or any other vehicle. obtain the favor of my patronage. A stitch in the side taken in time saves nine spasms. Conscientiously averse to the fallacious stateDorothy's tincture of the rhubarb stalks in the ments, so much indulged in by various competitors, garden, doesn't answer, and it's a pity now they truth urges to acknowledge that on arrival, I did were not saved for pies.
not find things on such a footing as to insure uni
versal satisfaction. Mrs. P., indeed, differs in her No. VI.–From Mrs. PugSLEY to Mrs. RogERS. statement, but you know her success always surMADAM,— Although warmth has made a coolness, lous to merit commendation by the strictest regard
passed the most sanguine expectations. Ever emuand our having words has caused a silence—yet as mere writing is not being on speaking terms, and lumbago, through her studious efforts to please, and
to principles of economy, I found her laid up with disconsolate parents in the case ; I waive venting of animosities till a more agreeable moment. Having ing for it, but I am sorry to add-no abatement.
Doctor Clarke, of Wisbeach, in the house prescribperused the afllicted advertisement in the Times, Dorothy is also confined to her bed, by her unrewith interesting description of person, and ineffectual dragging of New River, —beg leave to say that mitting assiduity and attention in the housekeeping Master Robert is safe and well, —having arrived line; and Anastasia the same, from listening for here on Saturday night last, with almost not a shoe nightingales, on a fine July evening, but which is to his foot, and no coat at all, as was supposed to
an article not always to be warranted to keep its be with the approbation of parents. It appears, and small sizes, ditto, ditto, with Grace too ill to
virtue in any climate, the other children, large that not supposing the distance between the families extended to him, he walked the whole way totally unable to execute such extensive demands.
serve in the nursery,—and the rest of the servants Such an unprecedented depreciation in health makes
me doubt the quality of country air, so much reTAKE NOVICE
commended for family use, and whether constitutions have not more eligibility to offer that have been regularly town-made.
Our new residence is a large lonely mansion, with no connection with any other house, but standing in the heart of Lincolnshire fens, over which it looks through an advantageous opening: comprising a great variety of windmills, and drains, and
willow-pollards, and an extensive assortment of Khurafera similar articles, that are not much calculated to insam
vite inspection. In warehouses for corn, etc., it probably presents unusual advantages to the occupier; but candor compels to state that agriculture in this part of Lincolnshire is very flat. To supply language on the most moderate terms, unexampled distress in Spitalfields is nothing to the distress in
The corn has been deluged with rain of remarkable durability, without being able to wash the smut out of its ears; and with regard to the expected great rise in hay, our stacks have been burnt down to the ground, instead of going to the con
If the hounds hadn't been out, we might have fetch'd the engines, but the hunter threw George on his head, and he only revived to be sen
SALLY SIMPKINS LAMENT; OR, JOHN JONES'S KIT-CAT-ASTROPHE.
sible that the entire stock had been disposed of at the agricultural line of trade, as renders a wholesale an immense sacrifice. The whole amount, I fear, stock of patience barely adequate to meet its dewill be out of book,- -as the Norwich Union refuses mands. Thus stimulated to injudicious performto liquidate the hay, on the ground that the policy ance, he is as injurious to the best interests of the was voided by the impolicy of putting it up wet. country, as blight and mildew, and smut and rot, In other articles I am sorry I must write no altera- and glanders, and pip, all combined in one texture. tion. Our bull, after killing the house-dog, and Between ourselves, the objects of unceasing erdear. tossing William, has gone wild, and had the mad- ors, united with uncompromising integrity, have ness to run away from bis livelihood, and, what is been assailed with so much deterioration, as makes worse, all the cows after him—except those that me humbly desirous of abridging sufferings, by rehad burst themselves in the clover-field, and a small suming business as a shoe marter at the old-estabdividend, as I may say, of one in the pound. An- lished house. If Clack and Son, therefore, have not other item, the pigs, to save bread and milk, have already taken possession and respectfully informed been turned into the woods for acorns, and is an the vicinity, will thankfully pay reasonable compenarticle producing no returns—as not one has yet sation for loss of time and expense incurred by the come back. Poultry ditto. Sedulously cultivating bargain being off. In case parties agree, I beg you an enlarged connection in the turkey line, such the will authorize Mr. Robins to have the honor to disantipathy to gipsies, the whole breed, geese and pose of the whole Lincolnshire concern, tho' the ducks inclusive, removed themselves from the knocking down of Middlefen Hall will be a severe premises by night, directly a strolling camp came blow on Mrs. P. and family. Deprecating the deand set up in the neighborhood. To avoid prolixity, ceitful stimulus of advertising arts, interest comwhen I came to take stock, there was no stock to mands to mention,-desirable freehold estate and take-namely, no eggs, no butter, no cheese, no corn, eligible investment—and sole reason for disposal, no hay, no bread, no beer—no water even-nothing the proprietor going to the continent. Example but the mere commodious premises, and fixtures, suggests likewise, a good country for hunting for and good-will—and candor compels to add, a very fox-hounds—and a prospect too extensive to put small quantity on hand of the last-named particular. in a newspaper. Circumstances being rendered
To add to stagnation, neither of my two sons in awkward by the untoward event of the running the business, nor the two apprentices, have been so away of the cattle, etc., it will be best to saydillgently punctual in executing country orders with “The stock to be taken as it stands;"—and an addespatch and fidelity, as laudable ambition desires, ditional favor will be politely conferred, and the but have gone about fishing and shooting—and same thankfully acknowledged, if the auctioneer William has suffered a loss of three fingers, by his will be so kind as bring the next market town ten unvarying system of high charges. Ile and Richard miles nearer, and carry the coach and the wagon are likewise both threatened with prosecution for once a day past the door. Earnestly requesting trespassing on the hares in the adjoining landed in- early attention to the above, and with sentiments terest, and Nick is obliged to decline any active of, etc.
R. PUGSLEY, Sen. share, by dislocating his shoulder in climbing a tall tree for a tom-tit. As for George, tho’ for the P.S. Richard is just come to hand dripping and first time beyond the circumscribed limits of town half dead out of the Nene, and the two apprentices custom, he indulges vanity in such unqualified pre- all but drowned each other in saving him. Hence tensions to superiority of knowledge in farming, on occurs to add, fishing opportunities among the dethe strength of his grandfather having belonged to sirable items.
SALLY SIMPKIN'S LAMENT; OR, JOIIN JONES'S KIT-CAT-ASTROPHE.
BY TIIOMAS HOOD.
"On! what is that comes gliding in,
And quite in middling haste ? It is the picture of my Jones,
And painted to the waist.
For where's the trowsers blue ?
What is become of you ?"
The half that you remark Is come to say my other half
Is bit off by a shark!
Yet most completely do!
But I've been bit in two.
But now a shark must share! But let that pass—for now to you
I'm neither here nor there.
“ Alas! death has a strange divorce
Effected in the sea,
And even me from me!
To haunt, as people say ;
Are many leagues away!
And looking where the boat is,
Without 'a quarter's notice.'
Is near Columbia placed ;
Atlantic for my waist.
I've solved death's awful riddle,
To break off in the middle !"
TI E LOST I EIR.
LY THOMAS HOOD.
One day, as I was going by
That chill'd my very blood;
Bedaub'd with grease and mud.
As one stark mad with grief.
The left a lump of beef.
As wild as ocean birds,
She gave her “sorrow words."
A LOST CHILD ITS OWN CRYER.
“O Lord! O dear, my heart will break, I shall go stick stark staring wild !
Ile'd a very good jacket, for certain, for I bought it myself for a shilling one day in Rag Fair;
, yet I will say, you may search for miles and mileses
hot. Oh I'd give the whole wide world, if the world was mine, to clap my two longin' eyes on his face. For he's my darlin' of darlin's, and if he don't soon come back, you'll see me drop stone dead on the
place. I only wish I'd got him safe in these two Motherly arms, and wouldn't I hug him and kiss him! Lauk! I never knew what a precions he was—but a child don't not feel like a child till you miss him. Why, there he is! Punch and Judy hunting, the young wretch; it's that Billy as sartin as sin! But let me get him home, with a good grip of his hair, and I'm blest if he shall have a whole bone in
For some days previous to the fete, the Ilive ters far surpassing the dim intelligence of an African presented a scene of hurry, scurry, worry, and brain; the most provoking blunders naturally folflurry. As usual, Twigg interfered in every thing; lowed, and the black, as might have been expected and his voice was heard from all parts of the house, from one of his complexion, "played the very swearing, entreating, threatening, exhorting, di- devil.” Many a tumble he had over the numerous recting, or disputing with his wife and daughter on packages from London which encumbered the floors matters of taste. Never in the days of his indus. and tables, the stairs and the chairs. It was well try had he labored so unremittingly, so early, and the Ilive did not happen to be a glass one, such so late; he really slaved bodily like a negro, while as those which invite the spectator to observe Pompey, the true nigger, was set to work on mat- | the wonderful order, harmony, regularity, and