Leucus loves life, yet liveth wickedly;
He hateth death, yet wisheth he may dy
Honestly and well so what is naught he loves,
And what he would have good, he nought approves.
Since Thraso met one stoutly in the field,
He crakes his spirit, & knows not how to yield;
Looks big, swears, strouts with set-side-armes the streets,
Yet gently yields the wall to all he meets.
And to his friends that ask the reason, why?
His answer's this, My self I grace thereby :
For every one the common proverb knows,
That alwaies to the wall the weakest go's.
1131. On a Wittall.
I know my fate, and that must bear ;
And since I know, I need not fear.
Mopsus almost, what e're he means to speak,
Before it sir-reverence the way must break:
Such manners hath sir-reverence learnt at school,
That now sir-reverence Mopsus is a fool.
133. Turpe lucrum Veneris.
Will in a wilfull humour, needs would wed
A wench of wonder, but without a stock;
Whose fame no sooner through the street was spred, But thither straight our chiefest gallants flock.
Put case she's poor, brings she not chapmen on? I hope his stock may serve to graff upon.
134. Si hodie tibi, cras mihi.
A scornfull Dame, invited over-night,
To come and dine next morrow with a Knight,
Refus'd his sudden bidding with disdain.
To whom this message was return'd again;
Sith with so short time she could not dispence,
To pray her come at that day Twelve-moneth hence.
135. Better lost than found.
Lo here's a Coyner, yet he fears no death,
For he ne'r stamps in mettall, but in breath :
Swears from Believe me, & Good-faith & troth,
Up to God-damn-me; and without an oath
Protests in nothing, be he ne'r so bare,
He's brave in this, that he can bravely swear.
Cantus that Wooll-ward went, was wondred at; Which be excus'd, as done through pure contrition.
But who so simple, Cantus, credits that?
Tis too wel known, thou art of worse condition.
And therefore if no linnen thee begirt,
The naked truth will prove, thou hast no shirt.
Twenty small pieces I'd have borrowed late,
Which, if bestow'd, had been a gift not great:
For, 'twas a rich friend whom I ask'd, and old;
Whose crowded chests would scarce his riches hold.
He cry's, Turn Lawyer, and thoul't thrive: I'd have
No Councell, Caius, give me what I crave.
138. Fama mendax.
Report, thou sometime art ambitious,
At other times, too sparing, covetous;
But many times exceeding envious,
And out of time most dev'lish, furious.
Of some, or all of these, I dare compound thee;
But for a Lyer ever I have found thee.
Three daughters Otho hath, his onely heirs,
But will by no means let them learn to write ;
'Cause, after his own humour, much he fears,
They'l one day learn, Love-letters to indite.
The yongest now's with childe; who taught her then,
Or of her self learn'd she to hold her pen?
A Thief condemned for a hainous crime,
Was for to lose his Tongue at the same time :
But he the Court intreats with feigned tears,
spare his Tongue, and cut off both his Ears. To this, the Judge, and all the Bench agreed, And for th'Executioner sent with speed:
Who being come, and searching, there was found
No Ears, but Hairs; at which, all laughed round.
Saith th’Judge, thou hast no Ears. Sir (quoth the wight
Where there is nought, the King must lose his right.
141. On Dare, an up-start Poet.
Dare, a fresh author to a friend did boast,
Hee'd shew in cheap, his name upon a post,
But did Dare's friend to's hostes house but walk,
Sheel'd shew't him there on every post in chalk.
Two Gentlemen of hot and fiery sp'rite,
Took boat and went up west-ward to go fight;
Embarked both, for Wend-worth they set Sail,
And there arriving with a happy gale :
The Water-men discharged for their fare,
Then to be parted, thus their minds declare :
Pray Oares, say they, stay here, and come not nigh,
We go to fight a little, but here by :
The Water-men, with Staves did follow then,
And cry'd, oh hold your hands, good Gentlemen,
You know the danger of the Law, forbear;
So they put weapons up, and fell to swear.
Indeedla grumbles much, that he a penny,
Is levied in collection to the poore;
Indeedla but you are the first of any,
Will contribute unto a handsome-
Brutus at length escap'd the Surgeons hands,
Begins to frollique as if all were well;
And would not for the worth of thrice his lands,
Endure the brunt of such another hell;
But leaves this farewell, for his Physicks hire;
The child that's burnt, for ever dreads the fire.
All women naturally are called Eves
Because from Eve all women do proceed,
And by TH. are women turn'd to theeves,
Then unto Eve if you put . behind,
Your woman's turned quite from Eve to Evel:
But place a D. before, and you shall find
That shee by doing Evell is turned Devel,
So that from Eves to Theeves, from Theeves to Evel, Women do runne untill they come to❜th Devel.
Aske Humors why a feather he doth weare?
It is his humor (by the Lord) he'le sweare.
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