brother Fripperel, as my wife's nearest relations, to open my heart to you, and to beg your advice and assistance. Bol. He advice you! what can he advice you about! he was bred to nothing but to pick his teeth, and dangle after a court; so, unless you have a coat to lace, a feather to choose, or a monkey to buy, Fripperel can't assist you. Flim. But he is the brother of my wife, admiral. Bol. So much the worse for her and you too, perhaps -If she has listened to him, I shan't be surprized that you have a bad time of it! such fellows as he, who call themselves fine gentlemen, forsooth, corrupt the morals of a whole nation. Flim. Indeed, admiral, you are too severe. Bol. Indeed, my lord Flimnap, I speak the truthTime was when we had as little vice here in Lilliput as any where; but since we imported politeness and fashions. from Blefuscu, we have thought of nothing but being fine gentlemen; and a fine gentleman in my dictionary, stands for nothing but impertinence and affectation, without any one virtue, sincerity, or real civility. Flim. But, dear brother, contain yourself. Bol. 'Zounds! I can't-We shall be undone by our politeness-Those cursed Blefuscudians have been polishing us to destrov us. While we kept our own rough manners, we were more then a match for 'em; but since they have made us fine gentlemen-we don't fight the better for't I can assure you. Enter FRIPPEREL. Frip. What, is my dear brother and magnanimous ad• miral firing a broadside against those wretches who wear clean shirts and wash their faces? eh! Bol. I wou'd always fire upon those, good brother, who dare not shew their faces, when their king and country want 'em. Flim. My dear brothers, let us not wander from the subject of our meeting-I have sent to you for your advice and assistance in an affair that nearly concerns me as a man, a nobleman, and the father of a family. Frip. What can possibly, my dear lord, disturb your tranquility, while you have fortune to purchase pleasures, and beelth to enjoy 'em? Bol. Well said, FripperelThere spoke the genius of a fine gentle man Give him but dainties to tickle his palate, women to flatter his vanity, and money to keep the dice agoing, and you may purchase his soul, and have his honour and virtue thrown into the bargain. Lrip. Well said, admiral; I would as soon undertake to steer thy ship, as teach thee manners. Bol. And I would sooner sink my ship, than suffer such fellows as thee to come on board her. Flim. I find, gentlemen, you had rather indulge your own spleen, than assist your friend. Bol. I have done. Frip. Come, come, let us hear your grievances. Bol. I'll cut her to pieces. Flim. She is a fine woman, and a woman of quality, and thereto e ought not to be cut to pieces for trifles. Bol. Thou art a fine gentleman, and ought to be hang'd: but what has she done? Flim. Hurt me, injur'd me, beyond reparation. Glim. I am ashamed to tell you. Bol. Out with it. Flim. Fall'n in love with a monster. Bol. A monster!-land or sea monster? Flim. The new progidy-this Quinbus Flestrin-The man-mountain-Gulliver-the English giant. Frip. Ha ha! what, and are you afraid, brother, he should swallow her? for you cannot possibly be afraid of any thing else. Bol. I don't know what to think of this-In love with a monster! my sister has a great soul, to be sure— -But all the women in Lilliput are in love with him, I think--The devil is in 'em-And now they have seen the English giant, they'll turn up their noses at such a lusty fellow as I am. But how do you know this? have you intercepted her love-letters? Frip. Or have you ever caught her in his sleeve, or coat pocket? or has she been locked up in his snuff-box ?-Ha? ha! ha! Flim. I cannot bear to jest, when the honour of myself and family is at stake I have witnesses that she visits him every day, and allows, and takes great familiarities. Frip. She's a woman of quality you know-and therefore A 2 I cannot I cannot possibly agree to abridge my sister of her natural rights and privileges. Bol. What! is cuckolding her husband a natural right? Frip. Lord, brother, how coarsely you talk-Besides, you know it can't be, it can't be; for did not Gulliver tell us, when we talk'd to him about the customs of his country, that it was a maxim with the English, never to lie with another man's wife. Bol. No matter for that-Though he's a monster among us, he may be as fine a gentleman as you are in his own country; and then I wou'd not take his word for a farthing. Frip. Brother, I have no time to quarrel with you now; for Gulliver, you know, is to make his entrance immediately he is to be created a Nardac of this kingdom, and we have all orders from the king to assist at the ceremony. -So, brother Flimnap, better spirits to you; and better manners to you, my dear bully broadside, Ha! ha! ha! Exit Bol. A pretty counsellor, truly, to consult with in cases. of honour-What is the meaning of bringing this manmountain into the metropolis, and setting him at liberty? -zounds, if the whim should take him to be frolicsome, he'd make as much mischief in the city, as a monkey a◄ mong China. Flim. He has sign'd the treaty of alliance with us, and is brought here to receive honours, and be ready to assist Bol. I wish he was out of the kingdom; for should he prove an ungrateful monster, like some other of our allies, and join our enemies, we shall consume our meat, and drain our drink to a fine purpose ! Flim. 'Tis my interest in particular to get him hence, If I can; and therefore I will join you most cordially, in any scheme to send him out of the kingdom. Bol. We'l think of it-Trumpets sound.) What's that noise for? Flim. To call the guards together, to attend the procession: I will put on my robes, and call upon you to attend the ceremony. Bel. I'l wait for you-going)-But do you hear, Brother, talk to your wife roundly; don't fight her at a dis tance tance, but grapple with her; and if she won't strike, sink her. Exit Bolgolam; Flim. Grapple with her, if she won't strike, sink her! 'Tis easily said, but not so easily done-These batchelors are always great heroes 'till they marry—and then -they meet with their match-Let me see why shou'd I disturb myself about my lady's conduct, when I have not the least regard for my lady herselt?-However, by discovering her indiscretions, I shall have an excuse for mine; and people of quality shou'd purchase their ease at any fate. Let jealousy torment the lower life, Where the fond busband loves the fonder wife: With us no vulgar passions should abide ; Enter Lady FLIMNAP and FRIPPEREL, (peeping and laughing.) EExit L. Flim. Come, brother, the owls are flown. Ha! ba! ha! This is the most lucky accident but how came the letter into your hands? Frip. The moment I left your poor husband and my wise brother, consulting how to punish you for your un natural love of this Gulliver Both. Ha! ha! ha! Frip. And was hast'ning to the place, to prepare for the procession, an elderly lady (who tho' past love-matters herself, seemed willing to forward 'em) pulls me gently by the sleeve, and with an insinuating curtsey, and an eye that spoke as wantonly as it cou'd, whispered me-My Lordmy lord Flimnap-I am commissioned to deliver this in to your hands, and hope to have the honour of being better known to you then curtesying again, mumbled something, look'd roguishly, and left me. L. Flim. Ha ha! ha! I am glad I have caught at last my most virtuous lord and master- O these modest men-they are very devils-however I can ballance accounts with him-but pray read the billet-doux to me. I am impatient to hear what his slut says. Frip. 'Tis a most exquisite composition, and a discharge in 8 in full to you for all kinds of inclinations that you may have now, or conceive hereafter either for man or monster. Ha ha! ha! L. Flim. Thou art the best of brothers, positively. Frip. There's a bob for your ladystrip too, I can tell you that. L. Flim. O! pray let me have it. Frip. Reads on, Why did not I see my dearest lord Flimnap last night? did public affairs, or your lady, keep you from my wishes? L. Flim. Not his lady, I can assure her. Ha! ha! Frip. Reads on, Time was when affairs of state could be postpon'd for my company. L. Flim. Cou'd they so? then the nation had a fine time of it! Frip. Reads on. And if yon sacrific'd the last night to your lady, which by all the bonds of love shou'd have been mine, you injur'd both of us; for I was panting for you, while she was wishing herself with her adorable Man mountainlet me conjure you to leave ber to her giants, and fly this evening to the arms of your ever tender languishing MORETTA. L. Flim. Upon my word, the languishing Moretta makes very free with me—— but this is a precious letter, and will settle all our family-quarrels for the future. Frip. But come, let us to a little consultation of mischief shall we send for the admiral and shew it him? — We shall have fine bouncing. L. Flim. No, no, let us make the most of it-I'll fit him for calling in relations to assist him-If this hubbub is to be made every time I follow my inclinations, one might as well have married a tradesman as a man of quality. Frip. I wonder that he does not insist upon your looking after his family, and paying his bills. L. Flim. And taking care of my children. Ha! ha! ha! poor wretch. Frip. Poor devil! but what shall we do with the letter? L. Flim. Send it directly to my good lord-but first copy it, lest he should forswear it at the proper time. Frip. Or supnose, when at our next consultation upon your indiscretions, that we send the letter to him before us all, to see how he will behave upon it-let me alone for that. L. Flim. |