Ene. Now heavens forbid such scarcity of youth!
Ulyss. Amen.

Agam. Fair Lord Æneas, let me touch your hand;
To our pavilion shall I lead you, sir.
Achilles shall have word of this intent;

So shall each lord of Greece, from tent to tent:
Yourself shall feast with us before you go,

And find the welcome of a noble foe.

Ulyss. Nestor!

Nest. What says Ulysses?

[Exeunt all but Ulysses and Nestor.

Ulyss. I have a young conception in my brain;
Be you my time to bring it to some shape.
Nest. What is 't?

Ulyss. This 'tis :

Blunt wedges rive hard knots: the seeded pride
That hath to this maturity blown up

In rank Achilles must or now be cropp'd,
Or, shedding, breed a nursery of like evil,
To overbulk us all.

Ulyss. This challenge that the gallant Hector sends,
However it is spread in general name,
Relates in purpose only to Achilles.

Nest. The purpose is perspicuous even as substance,
Whose grossness little characters sum up:
And, in the publication, make no strain,
But that Achilles, were his brain as barren
As banks of Libya,-though, Apollo knows,

'Tis dry enough—will, with great speed of judgement,
Ay, with celerity, find Hector's purpose

Pointing on him.

Ulyss. And wake him to the answer, think you?
Nest. Yes, 'tis most meet: who may you else oppose,
That can from Hector bring his honour off,

If not Achilles? Though 't be a sportful combat,
Yet in this trial much opinion dwells;

For here the Trojans taste our dear'st repute
With their finest palate: and trust to me, Ulysses,
Our imputation shall be oddly poised

In this wild action; for the success,
Although particular, shall give a scantling
Of good or bad unto the general;

And in such indexes, although small pricks
To their subsequent volumes, there is seen

The baby figure of the giant mass

Of things to come at large. It is supposed
He that meets Hector issues from our choice:
And choice, being mutual act of all our souls,
Makes merit her election, and doth boil,
As 'twere from forth us all, a man distill'd
Out of our virtues; who miscarrying,

What heart from hence receives the conquering part,
To steel a strong opinion to themselves?
Which entertain'd, limbs are his instruments,
In no less working than are swords and bows
Directive by the limbs.

Ulyss. Give pardon to my speech;

Therefore 'tis meet Achilles meet not Hector.
Let us, like merchants, show our foulest wares,
And think, perchance, they 'll sell; if not,
The lustre of the better yet to show,
Shall show the better. Do not consent
That ever Hector and Achilles meet;

For both our honour and our shame in this
Are dogg'd with two strange followers.

Nest. I see them not with my old eyes: what are they?
Ulyss. What glory our Achilles shares from Hector,
Were he not proud, we all should share with him:
But he already is too insolent;

And we were better parch in Afric sun
Than in the pride and salt scom of his eyes,
Should he 'scape Hector fair: if he were foil'd
Why then, we did our main opinion crush
In taint of our best man. No, make a lottery ;
And by device let blockish Aja: draw

The sort to fight with Hector: among ourselves
Give him allowance for the better man ;
For that will physic the great Myrmidon
Who broils in loud applause, aid make him fall
His crest that prouder than blu: Iris bends.
If the dull brainless Ajax comesafe off,
We'll dress him up in voices: f he fail,
Yet go we under our opinion stil

That we have better men. But hit or miss,
Our project's life this shape of sose assumes,
Ajax employ'd plucks down Achlles' plumes.
Nest. Ulysses,

Now I begin to relish thy advice;
And I will give a taste of it forthwith

To Agamemnon: go we to him straight.

Two curs shall tame each other: pride alone

Must tarre the mastiffs on, as 'twere their bone. [Exeunt.

Ajax. Thersites !

ACT II-SCENE I

The Grecian camp.

Enter Ajax and Thersites.

Ther. Agamemnon-how if he had boils-full, all over, Ajax. Thersites !

[generally? Ther. And those boils did run ?-Say so,-did not the general run then? were not that a botchy core? Ajax. Dog!

[now. Ther. Then would come some matter from him; I see none Ajax. Thou bitch-wolf's son, canst thou not hear? Feel, then. [Strikes him.

Ther. The plague of Greece upon thee, thou mongrel beefwitted lord!

Ajax. Speak then, thou vinewed'st leaven, speak: I will beat thee into handsomeness.

Ther. I shall sooner rail thee into wit and holiness: but, I think, thy horse will sooner con an oration than thou learn a prayer without book. Thou canst strike, canst thou? a red murrain o' thy jade's tricks!/

Ajax. Toadstool, learn me the proclamation.

Ther. Dost thou think I have no sense, thou strikest me thus ? Ajax. The proclamation!

Ther. Thou art proclaimed a fool, I think.

Ajax. Do not, porpentine, do not; my fingers itch.

Ther. I would thou didst itch from head to foot, and I had the scratching of thee; I would make thee the loathsomest scab in Greece. When thou art forth in the incursions, thou strikest as slow as another.

Ajax. I say, the proclamation!

Ther. Thou grumblest and railest every hour on Achilles, and thou art as full of envy at his greatness as Cerberus is at Proserpina's beauty, ay, that thou barkest at him.

Ajax. Mistress Thersites !

Ther. Thou shouldst strike him.

Ajax. Cobloaf!

Ther. He would pun thee into shivers with his fist, as a sailor Ajax. [Beating him] You whoreson cur! [breaks a biscuit. Ther. Do, do.

Ajax. Thou stool for a witch!

Ther. Ay, do, do; thou sodden-witted lord! thou hast no more brain than I have in mine elbows; an assinego may tutor thee thou scurvy-valiant ass! thou art here but to thrash Trojans; and thou art bought and sold among those of any wit, like a barbarian slave. If thou use to beat me, I will

begin at thy heel and tell what thou art by inches, thou thing of no bowels, thou!

Ajax. You dog!

Ther. You scurvy lord!

Ajax. [Beating him] You cur!

Ther. Mars his idiot! do, rudeness; do, camel, do, do.

Enter Achilles and Patroclus.

Achil. Why, how now, Ajax! wherefore do ye thus? How now, Thersites! what's the matter, man?

Ther. You see him there, do you?

Achil. Ay; what's the matter?

Ther. Nay, look upon him.

Achil. So I do: what's the matter?

Ther. Nay, but regard him well.

Achil. 'Well!' why, so I do.

Ther. But yet you look not well upon him; for, whosoever you

take him to be, he is Ajax.

Achil. I know that, fool.

Ther. Ay, but that fool knows not himself.
Ajax. Therefore I beat thee.

Ther: Lo, lo, lo, lo, what modicums of wit he utters! his evasions have ears thus long I have bobbed his brain more than he has beat my bones: I will buy nine sparrows for a penny, and his pia mater is not worth the ninth part of a sparrow. This lord, Achilles, Ajax, who wears his wit in his belly and his guts in his head, I'll tell you what I say of him. Achil. What?

Ther. I say, this Ajax-
Achil. Nay, good Ajax.

Ther. Has not so much wit

Achil. Nay, I must hold you.

[Ajax offers to strike him.

[comes to fight.

Ther. As will stop the eye of Helen's needle, for whom he

Achil. Peace, fool!

Ther. I would have peace and quietness, but the fool will not: he there that he look you there!

Ajax. O thou damned cur! I shall

Achil. Will you set your wit to a fool's?

Ther. No, I warrant you; for a fool's will shame it.

Patr. Good words, Thersites.

Achil. What's the quarrel?

Ajax. I bade the vile owl go learn me the tenour of the proclamation, and he rails upon me.

Ther. I serve thee not.

Ajax. Well, go to, go to.

Ther. I serve here voluntary.

Achil. Your last service was sufferance, 'twas not voluntary; no man is beaten voluntary: Ajax was here the voluntary, and you as under an impress.

Ther. E'en so; a great deal of your wit too lies in your sinews, or else there be liars. Hector shall have a great catch, if he knock out either of your brains: a' were as good crack a fusty nut with no kernel.

Achil. What, with me too, Thersites ?

Ther. There's Ulysses and old Nestor, whose wit was mouldy ere your grandsires had nails on their toes, yoke you like draught-oxen, and make you plough up the wars.

Achil. What? what?

Ther. Yes, good sooth: to, Achilles ! to, Ajax! to!
Ajax. I shall cut out your tongue.

Ther. 'Tis no matter; I shall speak as much as thou afterwards.
Patr. No more words, Thersites ; peace!

Ther. I will hold my peace when Achilles' brooch bids me, shall I?

Achil. There's for you, Patroclus.

Ther. I will see you hanged, like clotpoles, ere I come any more to your tents: I will keep where there is wit stirring, and leave the faction of fools.

Patr. A good riddance.

Achil. Marry, this, sir, is proclaim'd through all our host:
That Hector, by the fifth hour of the sun,

Will with a trumpet 'twixt our tents and Troy
To-morrow morning call some knight to arms
That hath a stomach, and such a one that dare
Maintain-I know not what: 'tis trash.

Ajax. Farewell. Who shall answer him?

Farewell.

Achil. I know not; 'tis put to lottery; otherwise

He knew his man.

[Exit.

Ajax. O, meaning you. I will go learn more of it. [Exeunt.

SCENE II

Troy. A room in Priam's palace.

Enter Priam, Hector, Troilus, Paris, and Helenus.

Pri. After so many hours, lives, speeches spent,

Thus once again says Nestor from the Greeks: 'Deliver Helen, and all damage else,