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1756.

Strange Kind of OSTENTATION,

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fhould have killed her: But the way of life I have now fallen into is of all others the best calculated to gratify my fantaflical temper. I have no near relation indeed to treat as an humble coufin all my life in hopes of being happy at my death; yet I abound in fycophants and followers, all whom I delude, like another Volpone, with the expectations of being made my heir. The abje & fpirit of these wretches flatters me, and amufes me. I am indolent, and hate contradiction, and can fafely fay that not one of my acquaintance has contradicted me for thefe leven years. There is not one of them but would be glad if I would fpit in his fave, or rejoice at a kick in the breech from me, if they В thought I meant it as a token of my familiarity. When I am grave, they appear as dull as mutes at a funeral; when I fmile, they gain like monkies; when I tell a filly ftory, they chuckle over every ridiculous particular, and thake their fides in admiration of my wit. Sometimes I pretend to be hort-tighted, and then not one of them fees farther than his nose. They fwallow four wine, eat musty victuals, and are proud to ride in my old boots.

I have been told of a certain prelate, who brought his chaplains to fuch a degree of fervility, that after every deal at whift, they would ask him, what he would chufe to have for trumps next deal? D I keep my fellows in equal good order. They all think ine a clofe old hunks, and imagining that winning their money will keep me in good humour with them, they practice all the arts of harping to cheat themfelves. I have known them pack the cards at whift, that I might hold all the four honours in my own hand; they will load the dice in my favour at hazard; pocket themfelves on purpose at billiards; and at bowls if any one is near winning the game, he never fails in the next to mistake his bias. It is impoffible for the moft defpotick monarch to be more abfolute over his fubjects, than I am over thefe flaves and fycophants. Yet in fpite of all their endeavours to oblige me, I moft heartily defpife them, and have already drawn up a will, in which I have bequeathed to each of them a fhilling and a dog-collar.

But though I have fettled in my mind what legacies I fhail leave them, I have not thoroughly refolved in what manner I fhall difpefe of the bulk of my eltate. Indeed I am fully determined, like most other wealthy batchelors, either to leave my fortune to fome oftentatious pious ufes, or to perfons, whom I have never feen, and for whofe characters I have not

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the leaft regard or eftcem. To speak fincerely, oftentation carries away my whole heart: But then it is a little difficult to find out a new object to indulge my vanity, whilft I am on this fide the grave; by fecuring to me a certain profpect of pofthumous fame, which is always fo agreeable to living pride.

The hofpitals are fo numerous that my name will be loft among thofe more known and established of Guy, Morden, Bancroft, and I know not who. Befides in the space of four or five centuries, perhaps, it may be thought, notwithstanding my whole length picture and ftatue, that 1 had afiftance from parliament. If Iorder my money to be laid out in churches, they will never be built. If in temples, gardens, lakes, obelisks, and ferpentine ivers; the next generation of the fons of tafte will demolish all my works, turn my rounds into fquares, and my fquares into rounds, and not leave even my bust, although it were caft in Plaister of Paris by Mr. Racftrow, or worked up in wax by Mr. Goupy. Or fuppofing in imitation of fome of my predeceffors, I were to Lequeath my fortune to my housekeeper, and recommend her in my will as a pattern of virtue, diligence, and every good quality, what will be the effect? In three weeks after my death the will marry an Irishman, and I fhall not even enjoy my monument and marble perriwig in Westminster-Abby.

Nothing perplexes me fo much as the difpofal of my money by my laft will and teftament. While I am living, it procures me the moft fervile compliance with all my whims from my fycophants, and feveral other conveniencies: But I would fain buy fame with it after my death. Do but inftru&t me, how I may lay it out in the most valuable purchases of this fort, only difcover fome new object of charity, and perhaps I may bequeath you a round fum of money for your advice. I am, SIR,

Your humble fervant, THOMAS VAINALL. It is faid by an old poet, that no man's life can be called happy or unhappy till his death: In like manner I have often thought that no words or actions are a better comment on a perfon's temper and difpofition, than his laft will and teftament. This is a true portraiture of himfelf drawn at full length by his own hand, in which the painting is commonly very lively, and the features very strongly marked. In the discharge of this folenin act, people fign and feal themfelves, either wife and good characters, or villains and fools: And any perfon that makes a ridiculous will, and bequeaths

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AFFAIR of Mr. A. BOW È R.

bequeaths his money to frivolous uíes, only takes a great deal of pains, like Dogberry in the play, "that he may be fet down an afs."

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The love of fame governs dur actions more univerfally than any other pasion. All the reft gradually drop off, but this This A runs through our whole lives. perhaps is one of the chief inducements that influences wealthy perfons to bequeath their poffeffions to oftentatious ufes, and they would as willingly lay out a confiderable fum in buying a great name (if poffible) at their deaths, as they would beftow it on the purchase of a coat of heraldry during their lives. They are pleafed with leaving fome memorial of their existence behind them, and to perpetuate the remembrance of themfelves by the application of their money to fome vain glorious purposes; though the good gentlemen never did one a to make themselves remarkable, or laid out a fingle hilling, in a laudable manner, while they lived. If an apotheons were C to be bought, how many rich fcoundrels would be deified after their deaths! Not a plumb in the city but would purchase this imaginary godship, as readily as he paid for his freedom at his first fetting up; and I doubt not but this fan:aftical diftinction would be more frequent on an efcutcheon, than on a coronet.

July

before he begins to endow a college, or found an hofpital, I fhould take it as a particular favour if he would leave his money to me, and will promise to immortalize his memory in the Connoiffeur.

HE pamphlet entitled, Six Letters

vincial of the Jefuits in England; illuftrated with feveral remarkable Facts, tending to certain the Authenticity of the faid Letters, and the true Character of the Writer, reprefents fuch ftrange facts, that our readers, we imagine, will not be displeased with a flight fketch of them, and of the dispute about Mr. Bower's character.

The principal defign of the author is to fhew that A. B. affumed a character to which he had no pretenfions, and artfully propagated a tale of himself which had no reality, and by that means obtained the favour of the great, a numerous subscription for his hiftory of the popes, a good place, and a noble penfion.

A narrative of Mr. B's efcape from the inquifition was published in 1750, by Mr. Barron, a diffenting minifter, agreeing with one taken from his own mouth by a lady in Cumberland, and with the ac'count given by himself to many of his acquaintances; and is as follows:

Upon an information that a perfon had fpoke difrespectfully of the inquifiDtion, whilft the guilty perfon fuffered at Rome, an innocent gentleman of Florence was by a villainous treachery decoyed thence to Macerata, where Mr. Br himself fitting in the council of the inquifition, he was tortured with a cruelty beyond that of Nero, and, at last, dimiffed upon advice that the true criminal was taken at Rome: But the unhappy gentleE man continued, ever after, fenfelefs and distracted. Another relation given by Mr. Br is still more frightful. A certain gentleman, his particular friend, happened to let fall an innocent joke about the garb of two capuchin friers, and being overheard by them, was accused to the inquifition. Mr. Br was ordered to take a guard, which is always in waiting, and to apprehend his unfortunate friend, whilft he was in bed with his wife, lately married, at midnight, and the leaft excufe would have been fatal to himself. The gentleman expired under his inhuman tortures, in prefence of the inquifiters. Mr. Br Aruck with hor. ror, refolved to make his escape, and to G quit a religion which fanctified fuch villanies. He procured from the inquisitorgeneral leave to make a pilgrimage to Loretto, but fhaped his course over the mountains to Switzerland, armed with a pocket

The difpofal of our fortunes by our laft will fhould be confidered as the discharge of a facred truft, which we should endeavour to execute in a just manner; and as we have had the enjoyment of rich potieffions, we ought carefully to provide that they may devolve to thofe, who have the moit natural claim to them. They who may first demand our favour, are thofe who are allied to us by the ties of blood: Next to thefe ftand thofe perfons to whom we are connected by friendship: And next to our friends and relations, mankind in general. But the humanity of a teftator will not be thought very extentive, tho' it reaches to pofterity, or includes the poor in general, if it neglefs the objects of charity immediately under his eye, or F thefe individuals who have the bent title to his benevolence. Virgil has placed thofe rich men, who bestowed none of of their wealth on their relations, among the chief perfonages in his hell. Wherefore I would advise my good correfpondent, Mr. Vainall, first to consider, whether he has not fome poor relation, ftarving, perhaps, in fome difant part of the kingdom: After that, let him look round, whether he has not fome friends, whom he may poffibly relieve from mifery and diftrefs. But if he has no relation, nor no perfon in the world that has any regard for him,

1756.

ESCAPE of Mr. BOWER.

pocket-pistol, in a refolution to dispatch himfelf for fear of torments, in cafe he could no ways efcape. Both he and his horfe were growing faint when he arrived among the Switzers: But whilst he was refreshing himself in a catholick canton, he faw himself defcribed, with a great reward for apprehending him, in a paper which two men were reading. He difguifed himfelf, got away immediately, or he would have been feized. From Berne he fell down the Rhine to Strasburgh, to avoid pathing through popish countries, and from Strasburgh he came on poft horses to Calais. No fooner was he alighted at his inn there, but advertisements were fixed upon the gate, defcribing him, and B promifing a reward for apprehending him. He endeavoured to cross the fea in a fishing-boat, but was forced back to Calais, the weather being too boisterous. Luckily lord Baltimore took him into his yacht. The day he landed at Dover, he was furprized to receive a letter directed to him from the inquisitor general, with promifes of honour and rewards, if he would return. But the perfon had disappeared, before he could enquire after him.'

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borrowed a horfe of father Strahan, the rector of the college, to go on a vifit to a friend at Lifle. His riding off with this horte to Calais, where he fold him, will account for the tremor he was in when he met lord Baitimere there; for tho' the Romifh inquifition (which has no more A power in France than in England) could not, the French marechauffe might be at his heels. This was in the year 1726, or 1727. On his arrival in England he appears to have frequented the lodgings of the provincial of the Jefuits. In 1727, he told Gordon, a popish prieß, now chaplain to lady Perth, that he was a jefuit, and was going upon the miffion to Scotland. Being introduced to the acquaintance of Mrs. Hoyles, wife of Mr. Hoyles, a printer in Great Wild-ftreet, Lincoln's Inn-fields, he put the rife of the proteftant religion in fuch a light to her, as raifed in her mind fcruples that made her very uneafy, til! about three Cyears after the became a catholic. Mr. B. coming frequently to her houfe, had feveral converfations with her husband about religion. Mr. B. with all the strength of argument defending the fide of the catholicks; and in about five years Mr. Hoyles alfo became a catholic: Mr. B. upon this event, congratulated them both, and hoped that his having been inftrumental in bringing it about would make fome attonement for his own neglect of his duty. Mr. Faden, a printer in Wine-office court, Fleet-ftreet, a proteftant, declares that he lodged in the house of Mr. Hoyles from 1733 to 1737 or 1738, that during that time Mr. B. vitited there hundreds of times; and that it was notorious to every one in the houfe, that Mr. B. was a jefuit, and had been the inftrument of converting first Mrs. Hoyles, and at length her husband to the popish religion; that they made no fecret of this at that time, and that he then heard Mrs. Hoyles, in prefence of her husband, frequently fpeak of Mr. B. as the perfon who first put them both in the way of be ing catholics.

This account Mr. Br publickly difowned in two advertisements, in the first of which he declares it in almost every particular abfolutely falfe, in the fecond very imperfect and falfe in many circumstances, promifing when he had compleated his fecond D volume to publish his own flory. This promife, however, he has never performed, and Mr. Barron charged him with denying at one time what he had afferted at another.

The author of the remarks tells us, that Mrs. Hoyles, widow of Mr. Hoyles, printer in Great Wild-street, is ready to make oath, that B. told her he was obliged to leave Rome on account of a nun; and that he is informed by the concurring teftimony of three eminent jefuits in Italy, in a letter from Rome, dated May 1, 1756, that it being whispered at Macerata that a nun, a young woman of quality, whofe ghoftly father B. was, had agreed to let him carry her off, her father threatened F him with capital punishment: But whilft informations were taking about this affair, B's fuperiors, the Jefuits, ordered him to Perugia. Being informed that a warrant was iffued for apprehending him, he made his Escape from this city dif guiled in a clown's drefs; which he laid afide, as foon as he got out of the pope's G territories, and put on a caffock that he carried with him. In the Scotch college at Douay he paffed for a brother Jefuit, going upon the miffion to Scotland, and was entertained with great kindness. He July, 1736.

B. asked Mrs. Hoyles, whether the thought that he might truft his money in the hands of the jefuits for an annuity: Because, faid he, it is all their own, I having no property. She told him, the would lay her life, if they agreed to take the money, they would faithfully fulfil their agreement. At his request the spoke to the gentlemen of the order, and on the 21st of August 1741, B. paid to father Shirburn, then provincial in England, as reprefentative of the fociety, 1100l. on condition of being paid, during his life, an annuity after the rate of 7 per Cent. X X

S.x

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Proofs of Mr. BOWER'S PRACTICES.

Six months after, on the 27th of February 174, he paid to the fame perfon 150l. more on the fame conditions. On the 6th of Auguft 1743, he added another 1ool. and had a bond for the whole from the provincial. This is proved by the books of Hill, the agent of the jefuits, by feven receipts for different payments of the annuity written and figned in B's own hand, and two others wrote by Hill, and fign'd by B. by the books of a banker in Henrietta-Atreet, Covent-Garden, on whom Hill gave B. draughts, and by the teftimony of the banker's fervant who paid the money to B. himself. This tranfaction had fuch weight with fome of B's jefuit acquaintances, that they recommended him to Mr. Retz, general of the order, as worthy of being readmitted amongst them: He had not (fays the author of the remarks) come into England, after throwing off his order on account of any fcruples of confcience, but after his order had thrown off him on account of irregularities in his condu&t.'

This ap

plication in B's favour had the defired fuccefs, for father Carteret, provincial of the jefuits, who died in March or April laft, a min of family, of learning, and abilities, with an irreproachable private character, declared, not long before his death, that he re-admitted B. in a formal manner, into the order, at Londen, fome time before the battle of Fontenoy, which was fought on the 30th of April 1745. And Mrs. Hoyles declares, that her husband carried from Mr. Carteret to B. the directory for him to fay his office by.

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July

of March, 1747, commenced fo zealous a champion for the reformation, was on the 14th of March, 1747, a very zealous papist, and a jefuit unrefervedly fubmiffive to his fuperiors. Thefe letters have been compared with other pieces written by him, and the hand-writing appears the fame. Mr. Bower, however, has denied them upon oath. This is faid to prove nothing, and indeed cannot prove much when the question concerning which the oath is taken, is only whether the deponent is a man to be credited.

March 25, 1747, is the date of his propofals for the hiftory of the popes, in which, to excite the attention of the publick, he affumed the high founding titles of A. B. Efq; beretofore Public Profelor of Rhetoric, Hiflory, and Philofophy in the Univerfities of Rome, Fermo, and Macerata, and in the latter Place Courfellor of the Inquifition. But it can be authentically proved that he never was either profeffor of rhetorick in Rome, or counsellor of the inquifition at Macerata. The firft is evident from the day-books of the Roman college, which have been confulted; and a jefuit inquifitor has not been known in the memory of man at Macerata. In the propofals he fays, What I have forfeited by adhering to truth, most of the Roman Catholicks in England know.'

Those who know any thing of him are

D fenfible (fays the author of the remarks on the lives of the popes, bearing date Douay, 1754) what he has forfeited in fome refpects. But they eafily fee that liberty, a bedfellow, the figure, and fortune of an efquire, and the favour of the great, are a glittering exchange for the cloak of a poor private jefuit.'

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Mr. B. fays he began a history of the popes when was at Rome: It appears that he refumed this work in England on a different plan; and the prefits arifing E from a fubfcription to it, powerfully ushered into the world and recommended by the protestant patron under whom he was planning, if not writing it, together with the pleating profpect of promifed penfions and places promifes not long after really fulnited) or some other prudential mo tives, determined him to make a fecond breach of thofe vows he had a year or two before folemnly renewed. But it was neceffary to do this with fuch caution, that is brethren the jefuits might not have it in their power to hurt him. With this view therefore he endeavoured to get his money cut of their hands. The repayment of money is the fubje&t of the fix letters faid to be written by B. to fa- G ther Sheldon, fucceffor to Shirburne the provincial, one of which is dated March 14, 1747, for 1746-7.

if thefe letters are genuine, there is no doubt, but that Bower, who on the 25th

A gentleman in the country being applied to before the publication of the hiftory of the popes, to encourage the work by foliciting fubfcriptions for the author, gave as a reafon for not doing it (and a good reafon it was to fo good a man) the profane raillery uttered by B. in his hearing on fecing fome paintings representing gofpel hiftories; the gentleman rightly judging, that no honour could be done to the proteftant caufe by fuch a champion. Martin Folkes, Efq; the late worthy pre fident of the Royal Societ, who, by fiequenting Tom's Coffee houfe in Ruffelfreet, Covent-Garden, had cften feen B. at a neighbouring bookfeller's fhop, the common rendezvous of the Romish priests in general, and of the jefuit priefts in particular, (whether B. daily repaired when he was in town) u ed to exprefs his fufpicions of B's character from this circumftance, and fubfcribed to his history merely because it was fashionable to do to.

June

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Poetical ESSAYS in JULY, 1756.

An Irregular ODE. Infcribed to the Hon.
Mr. SPENCER, occafioned by bis going to
Spaw. By Mr. DERRICK.

I.

SHALL Spencer tempt the faithlefs main;

And not command one grateful strain ? Forbid it, Mufes !-to your aid I fly !Nor to my (welling heart that aid deny.

2.

Neptune fmooth the furrow'd deep; Extend thy trident o'er the wat'ry way, (Thy trident raging storms obey)

Huth ev'ry ruder blast, and bid the wild
waves fleep.

Sov'reign of air! aw'd by whofe dread con-
troul,
[howl;
Nor mountain billows rage, nor tempefts
Safe waft him to his native fhore;
So fhall we thy pow'r adore;
So fhall we thy praise proclaim,
And fpread with chearful voice thy fame,
Wide as thy own domain from pole to pole.

4.

And yet thy mighty power how vain !
Thou boafted monarch of the main !
For, lo! at Spencer's happy fide,
Wifdom's fweet pupil, beauty's pride,
Cou'd with one look the calm restore,
And still the dreadful ocean's roar ;
The fea her Halcyon influence wou'd own,
And as the fmiles, forget the pow'r to frown.
5.

And thou, proud veffel, if fo rich a freight
By worth and virtue may be try'd,
In carrying Spencer and his bride,
Thou carry'it more than Cæfar and his fate.
6.

On the poop fee hand in hand,

The gods of love and marriage ftand; Whilft love and marriage pleas'd to find Themfelves, for once, thus firmly join'd, In honour of the union rare,

Shield with their wings the blifsful pair. 7. May

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